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the drawings underneath. He had drawn me. He was thinking of me as I was of him. My breasts tingled. Mon seul désir.
Then I heard voices in the hall. The door swung open and all I could think to do was drop to the floor and scramble under the table. It was dark under there, and strange to be on the cold stone floor alone. Normally I would hide in such a place with my sisters, and we would giggle so much we would be found out immediately. I sat with my arms wrapped round my knees, praying that I couldn't be seen.
Two men entered and came straight over to the table. One wore the long brown robes of a merchant, and must be Oncle Léon. The other wore a grey tunic to his knees and dark blue hose. His calves were shapely, and I knew even before he spoke that it was Nicolas. I had not just spent so many days thinking of him for naught. All of my thoughts had filled in the details of him — the width of his shoulders, the curls of his hair brushing his neck, his bottom like two cherries, and the taut line of his calves.
My thoughts would have to fill in more details now, for as the men began to speak I could see nothing of them but their legs. I could only imagine the looks on Nicolas' face — his smooth brow crinkling, his pinched eyes staring at me in the drawing, his long fingers tracing the rough drawing paper. All this I filled in as I sat in near-darkness, listening to them.
‘Monseigneur will be along in a moment,’ Oncle Léon said. ‘Let us consider a few things while we wait.’ I could hear paper rustling.
‘Did he like the designs?’ Nicolas asked. ‘Was he full of praise?’ The sound of his confident voice went straight to my maidenhead, as if he had touched me there.
Léon didn't answer, and Nicolas became insistent. ‘He must have said something. Surely you can see that these are superior drawings. He must be overjoyed with them.’
Léon chuckled. ‘It is not in his nature for Monseigneur Le Viste to be overjoyed by anything.’
‘But he must have approved of them.’
‘You are getting ahead of yourself, Nicolas. In this business you wait for the patron to give his opinion. Alors , you must prepare yourself to meet Monseigneur. The first thing you must understand is that he hasn't looked at the drawings.’
‘But he's had them for a week!’
‘Yes, and he will say he has studied them carefully, but he hasn't looked at them.’
‘Why not, in the name of the Notre Dame?’
‘Monseigneur Le Viste is very busy now. He does not consider something until he needs to. Then he makes a quick decision and expects to be obeyed without question.’
Nicolas snorted. ‘This is how a nobleman like him does business for such an important commission? I wonder if a man of true noble blood would work this way.’
Oncle Léon lowered his voice. ‘Jean Le Viste is only too aware of such opinions of him.’ I could hear the frown in his voice. ‘He uses hard work and loyalty to his King to compensate for the lack of respect even artists like you who work for him have.’
‘My respect is not so slight that I am not willing to work for him,’ Nicolas said rather hastily.
‘Of course not. One must be practical. A sou is a sou , whether from a nobleman or a beggar.’
Both men laughed. I tossed my head, almost knocking it against the tabletop. I did not like their laughter. I'm not close to Papa — he is a cold man with me as with everyone — but I didn't like his name and reputation thrown about like a stick for a dog to fetch. And Oncle Léon — I hadn't thought he could be disloyal. I would be sure to tread on his foot next time I saw him. Or worse.
‘I won't deny the designs are promising —’ he said now.
‘Promising! They're more than promising!’
‘If you would keep quiet for a moment, I'll help you to make these tapestries far better than they are — better than even you could imagine them to be. You're too close to your own creation to see what will make it better. You need another eye to look and see