“That won't get you anywhere.”
“Looks like you'd have to wait about an hour or two just to get your five gallons,” Gary commented.
“Maybe Lois can hold it a little while longer,” I wondered aloud. “This is a damn mess.”
“She's not gonna hold it,” Randi said, smiling. “She's not going to tinkle on the side of the road like a common drunk.”
I laughed. Even though I didn’t know Randi all that well, anyone who made fun of Lois was alright in my book.
“You guys shouldn't pick on Lois,” Gary said. “She's a sweet old lady.”
“I think you mean sour old bitch,” I muttered.
“No,” Gary replied. “That’s not what I mean at all. That’s just not even nice.”
Lois whipped out of the line of vehicles and cut around them. It was clear that this line was just for the gas pumps. Despite some horn-honking and obscene gestures, she made it to the front of the store and took the only empty spot, nearly in front of the door. She immediately bolted from the car and into the store.
“I think she took a handicapped spot,” I said, “But I ain't saying nothing.”
Randi snickered in the back.
“If you guys don't mind walking, I'm going to park a little farther away,” Gary said. “I don't want to park in the middle of that mess.”
“Fine with me,” I said.
“Me too,” Rebecca said. “I need to stretch my legs.”
Gary pulled the car into a spot in a slightly less crowded section of the parking lot, just around the corner from the main entrance.
“I'll wait on you guys here,” Randi said. “I need to smoke more than I need to pee.”
We approached the front entrance, and it was clear that the place was a madhouse. I could hear raised voices from the line of cars waiting on the pumps as people cursed and complained. There was a constant stream of people going in and out of the door. My plan had been to take a leak and get a drink, maybe a candy bar, but it was apparent from the line waiting to check out that I was probably not going to be making any purchases. I didn't think I was going to wait for the bathroom, either, but I stood around for a minute just checking out the scene. You could tell things were right at the edge of chaos. The frustration and urgency of the crowd was like an electrical charge in the air just before a lightning strike. At the register, a customer was arguing with one of the clerks about the fuel purchase limit.
A red-faced man in a sleeveless Jeff Gordon t-shirt and baggy denim shorts was pointing his finger at the cashier and complaining loudly. The angry customer said he needed more gas to get home. The frustrated clerk explained that they were not sure when they could get more gas and had to limit sales to make sure that everyone who needed gas could at least get some.
“Five gallons does not fucking help me,” the man said, raising his voice. “How the hell am I going to get to Tennessee on five gallons?”
“Sorry,” the clerk said, “I can't do anything about it. It's company policy because of the attacks. You need to move along or I'm going to call the police.”
Impatient people in line behind the man began shouting at him, urging him to pay up and move on so they could do the same. The man cursed back at crowd, giving them all the finger.
I could see Lois waiting in line for the restroom with a disgusted look on her face. Alice, who'd been riding with Lois, came walking toward me.
“I was going to go, too, but I think I'll take my chances elsewhere. I'd rather pee behind a bush than wait in this mess,” she said. “I'll be in the car.”
“I'll be out in a second,” I said. “I'm gonna stick around and wait on Rebecca and Lois.”
I was still watching the altercation at the registers when Gary touched me on the shoulder. When I looked to see what he wanted, he pointed outside the front entrance to the store. I turned in that direction. Two Virginia State