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idea of losing out on the opportunity of a lifetime. "Can I fill the paperwork out right now?"
    He laughed. "I'm not allowing anyone to do it right here, so go ahead and take your time."
    "What's the deposit?"
    "One month of rent, plus your first month of rent is also due upfront."
    "So ... three thousand?"
    He nodded.
    I reached into my bag and grabbed my check book, wrote out a check for three thousand buckareenos—which I never in a million years thought I'd ever do—and handed it to him. "Just in case. I don't want to miss it if I want it."
    "Okay, I'll hold on to this and rip it up if it doesn't work out."
    I smiled. "Thank you. Thank you so, so much."
    With one last pivot, I was on the floor staring at Autumn's shoe and ... thinking of Alistair.
    His face was fading in my memory now and it had only been weeks. I should've taken a picture. Why didn't I take a picture?
    Wait a minute. Why did I care?
    "Jane." Autumn tugged on my shirt. "Are you enjoying the smell of the floor or something? Let's go."
    Jerry helped me stand with a smile on his face. Autumn's face was as red as a Tarantino film set. I brushed my jeans off and laughed. "Sorry. Got deep in thought."
    Jerry pat my back as he opened the front door for us. "That can happen while pressed against linoleum."
    We laughed. Autumn didn't. Oh, great, I thought. The lecture was coming in like a storm cloud.
    I thanked Jerry and got into the car. He walked back into the building as Autumn sat down, threw her hands into the air, grabbed the steering wheel, and glared at me.
    "That look haunts me in my dreams," I said.
    "Jane!"
    Here it comes. The epic lecture. Wait for it. Wait for it. And....
    "Do you realize what you're doing? I mean, this is Philadelphia. The city. Alone. Young girl. Pretty girl. Alone! Not to mention the price tag. Fifteen hundred a month. Really, Jane? You're gonna blow all that money your parents spent eighteen years saving and then end up moving back in with them with nothing. And"—finally she took a breath—"what in the world were you doing on the floor in there?"
    I did my best Bill Cosby impression. Shaky face, pursed lips.
    "I'm serious. Do you really wanna blow all of that money? Some people would kill for that kind of graduation gift."
    "Oh, don't make me feel bad. I was going to wait until you left for school, but I'm giving you some of it. Donovan too."
    "No." She waved her hands around. "I don't want your money, Jane. I just want you to use it wisely."
    "So, apparently I have not one, not two, but three mother's. I'd say I'm lucky, buuuuut...."
    "I know, I know."
    "I'll be okay. You need to tone the responsibility dial down a few notches. If it doesn't work out within two months I'll ask Jerry if I can leave."
    "That's if you get the place." She pointed to a fancy couple walking into the building and greeting Jerry. "Those people might beat you to it."

    Donovan is almost always late, but so am I. So when we decided to meet somewhere I normally planned to get there ten minutes later than he said, then I ended up twenty minutes later, and by the time he would get there it would be thirty minutes passed our planned time. Never failed. Well, I guess sometimes it failed, but not most times. I like to try to be accurate if I catch myself. Never is a strong word.
    I sat on the hood of my car and he pulled up ten minutes later. The sun was still pretty high up there, not quite ready to wake up the other side of the world. Donovan sat beside me, pulled his knees up to his chest, and sighed. Bad sign. I waited for him to speak first, but he sighed again and that meant he wanted me to ask.
    "Don't make me ask." I poked his knee. "I know there's something you need to say."
    His lip quivered as he squeezed his eyebrows together.
    "What's wrong?"
    He gasped for air, then let out a soft cry. Last time I saw him cry he was ten and had accidentally ran over a baby bird with his bike.
    "Donovan?"
    Awkward. I wasn't experienced in handling boys that