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can’t risk Samuai being with me when I explode. At the same time, I fear he’ll never understand.
    “Davyd.” His name burns. I don’t let myself look at Samuai; I don’t want to see the hurt in his warm brown eyes. “This isn’t about taking sides. Samuai is needed here as one of the few people who can bridge the different groups in camp.”
    I stare across the table and dare Samuai to argue. He doesn’t.
    “It’s decided. You can leave in the morning.” Keane says. “Until Asher returns, all here will do what they can to keep the peace and prepare to face the Company. No word of the true mission will spread past this room.”
    There’s a murmur of agreement and the scrape of plastic on wood as people stand to leave.
    I hurry around the table, but I’m not fast enough to catch Samuai. He stalks from the room with stiff shoulders and all I can do is stare after him.
    An arm settles on my shoulders. I step back and shake free of Davyd, but his grin doesn’t falter. “I always knew that when it came to a choice between me and my brother, you’d choose me.”

Chapter Four
     
    [Samuai]
     
     
    “I’m a person too, you know.”
    I blink at the anger in Megs’ voice. Her mouth is set in a tight, straight line, and she’s glaring at me. I’ve done something wrong, but despite a quick replay of our walk from the meeting, I don’t have a clue what it could be. “I know,” I say gently, buying time.
    We’ve stopped outside the kitchens, and the smells of dinner are distracting, and it’s all I can do not to ask if we can wait to have this conversation until after we’ve eaten. Being rejected for my brother has made me hungry.
    Megs’ hands, resting on narrow hips, are fists. “I have feelings, hopes, dreams, goals.”
    “Of course you do.” I’m trying to focus, but I’m thinking about how good it would have felt to smash the grin off Davyd’s face. Asher’s reasoning might be sound, but I thought she’d go with her heart. And it would be me. If I’m honest with myself I wanted to go and have the chance to make up for what happened with Zed. There’s so much she knows, and so much she doesn’t.
    I realize I’m being glared at and add. “Dreams?”
    Megs huffs out a breath between gritted teeth. “I want revenge for my brother. I lie awake wondering if he’ll ever get well. I pray he will but then I worry he’ll be one of those who linger—damaged in his brain but his body refusing to give in.” Her voice cracks. “In that future I wish him dead because I know he’d hate living a half-life.”
    “I’m …” The platitude freezes on my tongue. I’m sorry. I am. But the words don’t seem enough, and I’ve said them before. I did my best to save Janic.
    Now I know I was trying to make up for the loss of another brother. Asher’s brother, Zed. He and I were closer than Davyd and I could ever be, a life cut short in a way that continues to give me nightmares. An end I’ve learned to not think about for self-preservation. If I remember, I’ll go mad.
    And so, I’m caught up in my regrets and guilt that I’ve spaced out on Megs again and she’s glaring.
    “He could wake up at any time,” I say.
    She pushes at my chest, two small fists with more strength than I realize. “Forget it. Just forget it all.”
    She spins away, but I grab her arm and step forward, blocking her path. “I don’t understand why you’re so mad.”
    “Clearly.”
    I stare into her eyes, like I can find some answers in their shadowed depths. “Then why don’t you explain?”
    She shakes her head. “What do you think I’m trying to do? I speak to you, but it’s like talking to one of the tents. I can see movement, but it’s most likely the wind.”
    “I’m listening now.”
    “Are you?”
    I drag my gaze back from the building we’d just left. The one where Asher and Davyd made their little plan to go off and save the settlement. “Yes.”
    She sighs. And I wish she’d argued or better yet,