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fainted five times so far, had had the vapours
twice and made recourse to her vinaigrette a dozen times a day. With any luck,
thought Tallie viciously, Lord d’Arenville would think The Honourable Miss
Aldercott charmingly fragile —then find himself leg-shackled to a clinging, lachrymose
watering-pot for the rest of his life!
    “So, Magnus, what
other criteria do you have for the mother of your heirs?”
    “It has occurred to
me that most of your candidates are rather spoiled and used to being indulged.”
    “Well, naturally they
are a little petted, but that is only to be expected…”
    “You miss my point,
Tish. Most of these young ladies have found it an almost intolerable hardship
to come to the country.”
    “Well, of course they
have, Magnus!” Laetitia snapped acerbically. “Any woman would. Who in their
right mind would moulder away in the country when they could have all the
delightful exhilaration of London society? Is that your latest requirement?”
    “Yes, actually —it
is. I wish the mother of my children to reside with the children, and London is no place for a
child.”
    “What rubbish!”
    “You know it’s true,
Tish, for you yourself keep your children here in the country all year round.”
    “Yes, Magnus, the
children live here all year round, not me. And that is the difference. Why, I
would go into a decline if I were buried here for an entire year!”
    “And the children —do
they not miss their mother’s care?”
    Tallie had to stifle
another laugh at that. Laetitia, a doting mother!
    The children would
love her if she would let them. As it was, they tiptoed around on their best
behaviour during their mother’s visits, hoping to avoid her criticisms and
sharp temper and heaving sighs of wistful relief when she left.
    “Naturally I spend as
much time as I can with my darlings, but I have my needs also, Magnus. And I
have responsibilities as George’s wife, and they take place in London , which is no fault of mine. But you
need not think I neglect my children, for I leave them in the best of care.”
    “Yes, I’ve noticed
that.” Lord d’Arenville’s voice was thoughtful. “Your sturdy little cousin.”
    Sturdy! How dared he?
Sturdy? Tallie was mortally insulted. She might not be as sylph like as
Laetitia, but she was not sturdy!
    “You’re wandering off
the point, Magnus.”
    Sturdy! Insensitive
beast!
    “Would you say that
any of these young ladies would be willing to live for, say, ten years in the
country?”
    “Ten years?” Laetitia’s
voice rose to a horrified screech. “No sane woman would agree to that! She
would die, rather! Why on earth would you wish to immure anyone in the country
for ten years, anyway?”
    There was a short
silence. Tallie craned to hear, but there was nothing. Suddenly Laetitia
laughed —a hard, cynical laugh.
    “Good God, you want a
nun, not a wife, don’t you?” She laughed again. “Your father tried that, if you
recall, and stuck to it for all of six months, while your mother cuckolded him
with every groom, stable boy and tenant farmer in the district. And serve him
right, say I. No, you couldn’t possibly think that isolating a wife in the
country would ensure her fidelity, not after that.” She laughed again. “And if
you have any doubts on the matter, dearest coz, ask George.”
    Lord d’Arenville said
stiffly, “My decision is nothing to do with either you or my mother. It is
simply that my bride must not mind spending my children’s growing years at my
country seat with them.”
    “Well, I wish you’d
told me earlier,” said Laetitia, “for I wouldn’t have bothered wasting everyone’s
time with this ridiculous charade. I am very angry with you, Magnus. I should
have realised you were not serious about wanting a bride—”
    “I am quite serious.”
    “Well, you certainly
won’t find one here who could accept—”
    “But I have.”
    “You’ve what?”
Laetitia sounded flabbergasted. “Don’t tell me one has