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shirt is on inside out, child bride,” said Mal, the side of his mouth kicking up. “What have you been doing?”
    Ears turning pink, Evelyn crossed her arms over her chest. Her husband did a bad job of hiding a smile. “None of your fucking business what we’ve been doing,” he said in a gruff voice.
    “You two disgust me.” Mal climbed to his feet then grabbed hold of my hand, hauling me upright. “You okay?” he asked.
    “Yeah. You?”
    He gave me a goofy grin and rubbed at the back of his skull. “My head would probably hurt if I could feel it.”
    There was my answer. He was plastered. I was entertainment. Any romantic notions were strictly mine. The story of my life, really.
    Finally the laughter quieted down. We were still the focus of every eye in the room, however.
    “Malcolm, is that your beer on the floor?” asked Ev, pointing at the mess my fallen bottle had made.
    Before I could open my mouth to apologize, Mal was there.
    “Yes. Yes, it is. But do not despair. I’ve got this.” He ripped off his T-shirt and knelt, mopping up the spill. There was a whole lot of hard flesh and bronzed skin right there. A truly impressive amount. His back was covered in ink, an intricate scene of a bird taking flight, the opening wings spanning across the breadth of his shoulders. A sigh rippled around the room at the sight of him half naked on his knees. It wasn’t just me making the noise, I swear. Though yes, I definitely contributed heartily.
    “Christ, Mal,” said Lauren. “Put some clothes on before you start a riot.”
    The man just looked up and grinned.
    “And I think that’s our cue to leave.” Lauren pushed herself off Nate’s lap. “It’s been fun. But we’ve got work tomorrow, unlike you musical slackers.”
    “You’re taking my Anne?” Mal asked. His lips turned down at the edges. He climbed to his feet, leaving his sodden shirt on the ground. “You can’t take my Anne. I need her for stuff … private stuff, in my room.”
    “Another time.” Lauren patted him on the back.
    “Stay and play with me, Anne.”
    “No,” repeated Ev.
    “Night, Mal,” I said. I couldn’t tell if he was serious or not. But no way, come morning, would I be scraping myself out of his bed and doing the walk of shame down my friend’s hallway.
    Nuh-uh.
    “Anne, pumpkin, don’t leave me,” he wailed.
    “Run. Go.” Ev ushered me toward the door. “He’s impossible when he gets like this. You’d swear he didn’t get enough hugs as a child.”
    “Good to see you again, Ev,” I said.
    She pulled me in for a quick kiss on the cheek. “You too.”
    “I need sexual healing,” Mal continued behind us. He then did a new dance. This one consisted of rhythmic pelvic thrusting while his hand swung through the air, mimicking spanking someone’s ass. The “Oh yeah” and “harder baby” only made it better. If ever a vagina was going to sit up and take notice, this would surely do it. The man had all the moves.
    “You need some fucking impulse control and coffee. That’s what you need.” David’s forehead crinkled. He pushed Mal back with a hand, bringing his porno dance performance to a halt. “Better yet, when was the last time you actually slept?”
    “I’ll sleep with Anne.”
    “No, you won’t.”
    “Yes, I will.” He raised a hand high. “For I am, Malcolm, Lord of the Sex!”
    With a muttered oath, David went nose to nose with him. Immediately Ben stood, sending the brunette sliding onto the floor. Poor girl, she wasn’t having the best night.
    “You heard Ev,” said David, getting in his face. “Not her friend. That’s not cool.”
    Mal’s eyes hardened. “You cock-blocking me, Davie?”
    “You bet I am.”
    “That’s not okay, bro.”
    Ben slung an arm over Mal’s shoulders, ruffled his hair. “Come find another toy.”
    “I am not a child.” Mal pouted.
    “How about her?” Ben pointed to a sleek blonde who smiled and preened in response. “I bet she’d like to meet