Read Spiritual Care: A Guide for Caregivers for Free Online Page A

Care
Barrier

    Angela was an old friend who just happened to be in town when I was
preparing to teach a class on spiritual care. Since Angela taught
psychiatric/mental health nursing, I decided to ask her advice
about my presentation. She looked at my outline and snorted,
"What is it with you and this supposedly spiritual care? This is
nothing but sneaky evangelism!"
    "Haven't you ever had a patient bring up spiritual concerns?" I
asked tentatively.
    "Never!" she insisted. "Patients don't expect a nurse to meddle
in their spiritual lives. If they want spiritual care, they'll go to
church."
    A large part of Angela's avoidance of spiritual care stemmed
from her rebellion against God. Early in her nursing career she
spent one term as a missionary in Pakistan. Those three difficult
years left her broken and angry. She had been running from God ever since. Her own personal baggage left her unable to hear the
spiritual concerns of others. Her graduate-school experience in
mental health nursing further solidified her sense that spiritual
concerns simply grew out of emotional disturbances -and sometimes caused them.

    Angela's reaction to spiritual care came from her own personal
struggles. Many times caregivers miss desperate pleas for spiritual
help simply because the concerns are not obvious. For instance,
Jerry appeared composed and confident before surgery. He never
indicated that faith was particularly important to him. When his
pastor visited, they watched a football game on television together
and joked about the underdog winning. The pastor gave Jerry a
firm handshake before he left and said he would be praying for
him.
    As she transferred Jerry to the operating-room stretcher,
Diane, his nurse, commented on how nice it was for the pastor to
visit. Jerry's eyes misted slightly, and his voice choked as he
replied, "Yes, but I wish he could be a real pastor instead of just a
pal."
    As she wheeled him toward the OR, Diane asked what real
pastors do. Jerry hesitated, then said, "Well, I suppose they pray,
but it means more when you can hear them do it." Diane offered
to pray with Jerry after moving him into the pre-op area. He
grasped her hand and sobbed as she asked God to guide the surgeon and help Jerry heal rapidly. "Thank you so much," he
responded. "I have been so scared. It really helps to know that
people are praying for me!"
The Bravado Barrier
    Most of us have been socialized into appearing self-sufficient and
emotionally controlled. Illness or other crises may quickly strip away our defenses, as we suddenly realize that we are not in control of our lives after all. Questions begin to nag at us, for if we
are not in control, then who is? Spiritual questions often draw
people to God, or even strike fear in their hearts. For instance,
Rose began attending church when she was diagnosed with congestive heart failure. When she stopped in to talk with the parish
nurse about her condition, she explained, "I'm really afraid that
I'm going to die, and if I do, I'll go to hell. How can I get right
with God?"

    However, most people are not as transparent as Rose. They
may appear composed and in control on the surface, but may be
falling apart inside. For instance, Jane was a third-grade teacher
with metastatic breast cancer. She continued to teach throughout
her chemotherapy, as well as to care for her husband and three
young children. She never discussed her fears, or even the pain
and nausea she experienced, not wanting others to pity her. When
Rachel, a friend from church, asked Jane if she could pray with
her, Jane sank into the nearest chair, saying, "I thought you'd
never ask I"
    Remember, we are all spiritual beings. We can bury our spiritual needs beneath a veneer of composure, but the needs remain.
Deep down inside, most people yearn for spiritual care and support from others. Don't hesitate to offer spiritual care to others
when their spiritual needs do not appear