Read Space and Time Issue 121 for Free Online Page A

with an expression I’d always longed to see from her. But it isn’t Natalie’s face gazing at me. I study the wall menu to avoid staring at her for a moment.
    “Drew–” She breaks into a hacking cough.
    “That sounds bad,” I say. I signal for water but the kid at the counter ignores me.
    “I hardly ever smoke, but this body has these cravings. All the fucking time.” She clears her throat with a rattling wheeze. “You said you could help?”
    “First of all, don’t worry. Your body’s safe.”
    Instead of thanking me, she narrows her eyes. “What do you mean, ‘it’s safe’? What, are you holding it hostage?”
    “It isn’t in police custody, is what I mean.”
    “So how long have you known where it is?”
    “Since the raid,” I admit.
    “And you didn’t call me?”
    “I didn’t know how to help you before. Now I’ve found a way to swap us back into our own bodies.”
    “Thank God,” she says. Finally, I see the gratitude I’d been expecting.
    I tell her about Enrique and Tony and the portable swaplights they expected to pick up in a couple of days.
    “I still wish you’d contacted me sooner.” She lights a cigarette and blows the smoke away from me.
    The teenager behind the counter looks up in annoyance and points to the “no smoking” sign on the far wall. Natalie flips him the finger and he sighs loudly, turning his attention back to his link-pad.
    “I’ve been thinking since you called... Drew, you don’t seem like the type to be into swapmeats.”
    I give her a questioning look.
    “I know you have a crush on me,” she continues. “And it’s sweet, really, even though I don’t... I don’t deserve it. So I was wondering. Did you follow me to that party? It’s okay if you did. I won’t get angry.”
    I stare down at the table. Grease coats it like a protective layer.
    “I figured as much,” she says.
    “I know it was wrong. But I’m glad I did it, because now I can help you.”
    “I don’t get you. Why are you so interested in me? We’ve barely spoken three sentences to each other before now.” She pulls on her cigarette and taps ashes from it into her coffee cup.
    I try to put it into words, but all I can say is, “You were– You’re so beautiful,” I say.
    She exhales smoke like a drawn-out sigh.
    “But that’s not it, not entirely,” I say. “I mean, I could tell there was something else, another side of you, you were hiding at work.”
    “Drew, we all do that. Every fucking person in the world.”
    I confess about the night I’d seen her outside of that nightclub wearing the red miniskirt, her clear and confident laugh with the man in the Lamborghini, the glimpse I’d had into her hidden life.
    She rolls her eyes. “You can’t possibly know who I am from that.”
    “You made assumptions about me, too,” I say. “You decided I wasn’t worth your time without giving me a chance.”
    She stabs out her cigarette and lights another. “Maybe you’re right. I don’t know. I don’t know anything anymore. This is all so unreal, Drew. And I do appreciate you helping me out. But...if you’re doing this because you expect something more...”
    Smoke hangs over the table between us, burning my eyes.
    When Natalie’s back in her own body, when her memories are where they belong, she’ll think more clearly. I will too, without all this confusion over my feelings for Tony. She’ll be grateful. And everything will make sense again.
     
    * * *
     
    We approach the pick-up location, an abandoned tenement with boarded-up windows and a crumbling stoop. The rust-speckled front door is crisscrossed with yellow caution tape, but unlocked.
    Our flashlights illuminate scattered syringes, food wrappers, used condoms, and chunks of ceiling plaster. The stairwell reeks of garbage as we climb to the third floor.
    “The apartment’s over here,” Natalie says. She’s wearing less makeup today and a white blouse and navy blue slacks that fit her body better. She still