state pen for check kiting and credit card fraud, Dooney learned a trade. His skills with shears were legendary by the time he made parole. With a dream and a barber starter kit from Wal-Mart, he began cutting neighborhood heads in his tiny apartment bathroom. When the booming traffic sent the police to his door, they expected to make a drug bust. Although none were found, Dooney was forced to become a legitimate operator and find a place to accommodate his loyal clientele. Blessed with friends in low places, a city councilman persuaded him to throw every cent he had into an abandoned storefront, to access the cityâs revitalization program in impoverished neighborhoods. Within two years of barely making ends meet, Dooney was awarded the deed to the building free and clear. Heâd been living that dream and laughing about his good fortune each and every day since.
This Saturday night was no different. The shop was humming with hip-hop music and black men catching up on old news and discussing current events. Children were not allowed to hang around after seven oâclock because there was no telling what topic might have jumped off once the sun set.
Dooney howled loudly when his seven-thirty appointment strolled in with a dinner box from Mayleeâs soul food down the street. âThatâs whatâs up! Rocky, you came through.â Dooney snatched the box, wrapped in a plastic bag, from the tough-looking customer. He pulled out a roll of money and passed a crisp ten-dollar bill to the man for his trouble, and then held the package up to his nose. âDid they put the extra syrup on my yams?â he asked, hoping they did. âOh man, Iâm on time for this! All yâall got to wait. My man Rocky is next.â To a chorus of complaints from those whoâd waited longer than anyone should have, Dooney held his arms outstretched. âWhat? Did any one of yâall cut for a brotha? Thatâs what I thought. Then quit your yapping. Rocky, go âhead on and get in the chair. This here is gonna feed me like two fat females. Ainât nothing like yams and big women. Ooh!â
âI know you gonna let me sample some that baked chicken,â Tim, the grossly overweight barber standing nearest to him, suggested, rubbing his pot belly that appeared to be more than full as it was.
âHuh? Did somebody say something?â Dooney smarted. âBrotha, youâs gonna have to get your own.â
âCome on, Dooney, donât be like that. Iâd run on over to Mayleeâs myself but my feet hurt.â
âYour feet hurt? So!â he shouted dispassionately to a roaring herd of customers who saw not a war of words but of wit whereby to the winner went the spoils. âYou think bad feet, bunions, and corns got anything on what I have to deal with. You donât want to get started. Canât no man up in here outcomplain me.â
âPut that hot plate on it, then,â Tim chided. âI got more stuff wrong with me than going to war with them Iraqis.â
âIf yâallâs going at it, I want in too,â asserted yet another busy barber, two chairs down.
âUh-uh, this is between me and Tiny Tim,â Dooney objected. âPlease believe, you donât want this.â
âBut I do want that,â Tim replied, staring down Dooneyâs meal.
âAll right, then, thereâs only one rule, no cussing âcause Iâm tryna quit. You cool with that?â
âItâs on, then,â Tiny agreed. âDo your thing.â
Suddenly the shop fell silent with anticipation.
âOkay, you said your feet hurt. Yeah, butâ¦my dogs are barking and I got a hitch in my back from standing all day.â
Timâs stomach shook as he chuckled. âToo easy,â he smirked. âOkay then, my feet hurtâ¦my back is tight, and my momma told me last night that I was adopted.â A quiet band of âoohsâ rose into