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happening in too short of an amount of time… I swallowed hard and began to sort through the many bags our shopping trip had yielded.
    Ethan had bought a plastic caddy for my toiletries to go into, to make it simpler to carry them back and forth to the restroom. I spent several long minutes loading it with what we’d purchased until I was satisfied, then I went and brushed my teeth. I stared at myself in the mirror for a long minute and took the brush he’d bought me to my hair. I brushed it until it was only slightly wavy and it shone and then peeked into the hall.
    I waited until it was clear and then ghosted up its length to Ethan’s door, shutting the door tightly behind me. I closed my eyes and felt torn. I wanted to be safe, where no one could judge or hurt me but I had to admit to myself the only person I felt safe around so far was Ethan… and maybe Doc and by extension Chandra.
    I pulled out clothes and tore off tags, hanging things neatly in the closet while I made up my mind. I turned back to the bed and decision made, I set about getting dressed. New bra, new panties and it was amazing how much better I felt just with those things. I hung up the dress I’d arrived in, hiding it in the back of the closet, apart from my new things.
    I trailed fingers along the crisp cotton of the dress I’d chosen today and told myself I really didn’t need to be brave. That I could stay here, in the room and wait for Ethan to come back and that would be okay… but I found myself picking up the dress anyways. I stepped into it and shrugged into the straps and with a deep breath, reached around back where I zipped it almost all the way up.
    I couldn’t make it all the way, I wasn’t flexible enough in my current state so the top three inches of the zipper stayed down. I let my hair cover it and slipped my feet into the plain brown sandals which hurt but I was used to the pain by now. Or at least that’s what I kept telling myself.
    It was a white sundress in the baby doll style and fit like a dream. The edge was hemmed in white eyelet lace and the lines of it were crisp and clean. It fell to just above my knees and was more modest than what I had arrived in which pleased me. I found myself hoping it would please Ethan as well and that startled me.
    While it was true I was afraid of this new life… I wasn’t looking to replace Chadwick with Ethan. I swallowed. That would not only be wrong, horribly twisted, it would also be completely unfair to Ethan. I sat down on the bed and sniffed even as bass beats began filtering through the wall from the common area of the club house out front.
    God help me I was so confused. I didn’t know what to do and after so long, so many year s of being told what to do, of being a prisoner in Chadwick’s home, I didn’t fully know how to operate out here. On my own… I closed my eyes and wiped away some more stray tears. A soft knock came at the door.
    “Come in…” I said softly and realized whoever it was couldn’t hear me. I got up and cracked the door. Chandra gave me a one sided smile.
    “Oh look at you!” she exclaimed, “Can I come in?” I nodded and opened the door wider and she slipped in. She lightly grasped my shoulders and looked me over.
    “You go out there you need to stay close to Trigger you understand me?” she asked.
    I nodded and turned around to pick up the white headband that had come with the dress. She snapped my zipper up the final three inches for me without being asked and I jumped but turned back around smiling, grateful.
    “I mean it darlin’. You don’t want anyone mistaking you for a club whore.” I nodded gravely and slid the headband into my hair so it would hold it back from my face. Chandra fluffed some of my hair forward over my shoulders and smiled.
    “Look a lot better without all them bruises but you’re lovely.” She smiled at me and I gave one back in return hoping it wasn’t as weak as I felt it was.
    “Ready?” she asked me