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wasting energy thinking about her. There was plenty of pussy out there eager to get my dick wet.
     
    I had joined the Blood Dogs MC when I was only sixteen. It was the only thing I ever wanted in life other than Lilly. I dropped out of school and became a prospect, cleaning up shit and piss every day. But it was all worth it to get that patch on my cut that said: Member.
     
    The Blood Dogs were my family and I'd always be there for them.
     
    I stumbled downstairs to the clubhouse weight room. The sun had barely risen but Juice was awake and on the bench press already. Juice was named for his over-sized muscles that were no doubt fueled by steroids.
     
    “Little early to be working out?” I asked.
     
    Juice set the bar of weights down and sat up, his shaved head shining from the light. “You shouldn't even be up, Kellan. The amount of shots you took last night should've sent you into a coma.”
     
    “Couldn't sleep.” I walked around the bench press and spotted Juice. He groaned with every rep, his veins popping out of his forehead. “One more, Juice!”
     
    Juice cursed as he pumped the bar up, his arms shaking uncontrollably. I took over the weight of the bar and set it down. I grabbed a white towel from a pile and threw it at him.
     
    “Thanks,” he said, wiping the buckets of sweat from his forehead. “You get laid last night? There was some hot tail here.”
     
    “Of course,” I lied. “Had two of 'em. Never been sucked off so good in my entire life.” I couldn't let him know what really happened with the one chick last night. I brought her up to my room and she was all ready for me, naked and begging me to fuck her hard. But I couldn't go through with it. I thought I was ready to move on from Lilly but something stopped me.
     
    “Good for you, Kellan. I had myself a real hot redhead. The biggest tits you could imagine.” Juice spread his hands apart to visualize the size. “You can bet your ass I buried my cock in that cleavage until I came all over her.”
     
    I didn't want to talk about other girls right now. “I'm going to go for a walk and clear my head. We have anything going on today?”
     
    Juice shook his head, wrapping the white towel around his neck. “Prez told me we got the day off.”
     
    “I'll have my cell on me. Call me if something comes up.”
     
    As I walked out, Juice returned to the bench press. I could hear his groans as I left the clubhouse. The man was a workout fiend.
     
    Pike stopped me at the exit, pressing his glasses to his nose. “How the fuck are you even alive after last night, Kellan?”
     
    “Next time you want to kill me, try a gun instead of alcohol.” I punched Pike in the arm and he got me in a headlock for a moment before letting me go.
     
    I walked down main street of Saint Marks. The air was cold and it was too early for any shops to be open. Except for Julie's donuts. The line was out the door—the only place in town that served reasonable coffee.
     
    If I was so over Lilly, then why couldn't I get her out of my head? I thought about all those times she sat on the back of my bike as we rode around town. Her hands always held onto me so tight. Why couldn't we go back to that? Lilly must know that I was innocent. I'd never kill a man unless there was good reason to.
     
    I was so lost in my thoughts that I didn't even realize that I was outside Lilly's apartment building. The four-story complex was one of the most expensive places to live in Saint Marks. Without Mr. Spencer's money, Lilly would never be able to afford something like this on her artist income.
     
    I thought about going to her front door and knocking. What would I even say to her this early in the morning? I imagined her dressed in a tiny white shirt and only a pair of panties. I could kiss her and do away with all the words. They only got in the way. But in the end, I'd wake her up and make things a whole lot worse.
     
    A black stretch limo pulled up and parked behind me. I