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hand and squeezed it tightly. “You should check it out sometime. We could go with you if you want. Or not,” she added, taking in the panicked expression that had settled over my face.
    I swallowed loudly, and looked away from her, feeling the shame creep back up. “There are just details people don’t need to hear. I just can’t.”
    She frowned but didn’t respond, and I knew her feelings were hurt. I never kept anything from either of them, but this was different. I just hoped my friends would understand.
    Brianna suddenly appeared in the seat next to me, causing me to jump and breaking the silence that had stretched between Sydney and I. Aaron sat next to Sydney and pulled her into the debate he and Brianna were having about the announced Halloween parties that some of the frats were throwing at the end of the month. A couple of our other classmates sat and chatted until it was time for Sydney and I to part and go to our separate classes.
    I walked across the campus by myself, basking in the momentary silence. My last class of the day was more involved than the others, so I forced myself to pay attention the best I could.
    After it was over, I found a tree near the parking lot Sydney had parked in earlier, and sat on the grass in the shade. I worked on the homework I had been given, and by the time Sydney and Amanda showed up, I had completed it all.
    The drive home was quiet, both of the girls had seemed to pick up on my mood and gave me some space. Amanda made tacos for dinner, and we ate on the couch, watching a couple of cheesy sitcoms that we all really loved.
    As soon as I was done eating, I retreated to my bedroom in a desperate attempt to be away from Amanda and Sydney. I loved them, of course, but they both watched me as if I was a bomb and only moments from detonating. The irony of the situation wasn’t lost on me. I had always been the most reasonable and level headed in our threesome, but overnight I had turned into the emotional wreck that needed babysitting.
    Tuesday continued on very much like Monday, and although I only had two classes, they were longer than the other three. I finished all of my homework before I met up with my friends, and when we got in the car I made an excuse about going to my mom’s house. We pulled into the parking lot and I went straight from Sydney’s BMW to my small Nissan without even going inside the apartment.
    When I got to my mother’s house, I used the key to let myself in knowing my mom wouldn’t be home from work yet, but needing to be around something comforting.
    My mom was a nurse and had been for as long as I could remember. She worked in obstetrics, and often talked about the joy that birthing babies gave her. My mom had been an amazing mom to my brother, Matthew, and me. I didn’t remember our father, but Matt did and he refused to talk about him. He had been a contractor, and he and my mother were high school sweethearts, seemingly in love. But at one point my father started sleeping with one of the interior decorators his company used, and after he divorced my mom he and his new girlfriend had moved to Texas.
    If my mom ever faltered in her parenting as a result, it was never apparent to me. She proceeded on through life as if it was supposed to be the three of us. She had a crazy schedule, but still somehow managed to make it to all of Matthew’s football games, and every single piano recital I had.
    Now, at 49-years-old, her house was empty and I worried she was lonely. She never really dated, telling us she didn’t have the time when we asked. I even tried to set her up with online dating at one point, but she dismissed the idea. Matthew and I were always told we were spitting images of our mother, with our dirty blonde hair, and bright blue eyes. But Matt favored our father in his body-wise, hulking over both of our 5’7 builds with his 6’2 frame.
    I moved into the family room and just looked around. That room was the most used in the house,