Read Scarleton Series I : Before the Cult for Free Online Page B

no
sugar?”
    “Yes?”
    “Bitter. And
when you’re done you have this tart aftertaste just sitting there
in your mouth. Delicate and lasting, enticing you to have another.
Calvin was like that,” he paused. Then sternly he continued, “He
might have gone the way he did but he never tried to drag anyone
down with him. He knew it was over for him but that is no
indication that he did not believe in what we were doing. He was
bitter with integrity. Failure is not what tore him up but the
weight of this world twisting and gnawing at his core.”
    I nervously
nodded, uncertain of what kind of response he expected. His eyes
were not on me but I could feel his mind’s eye burning me with a
concentrated and an indignant gaze. Belligerent energy exuded from
his frigid and deceptively disinterested posture. It was enough to
turn my insides pale. The conviction that if I uttered a sound I
would trigger an explosive quarrel moved me to silence. Inside, a
tempest of desolation drowned my thoughts and spirit.
    There was bump
and then the rattling ceased as the truck turned right into the tar
road towards the town. On the horizon lay wealthy outer suburbs
where roads where guarded by pine trees and life was tranquil.
    With his eyes
still fixed on the road, and perhaps tuned into my affliction,
Macxermilllio uttered, “We need help!” The unwilling words a
weight on his tongue. Because, put simply, we were in too deep.
     

Chapter
3

1
     
    Friday morning
we reconvened at my place. Each of us had retired to our homes on
Thursday evening, still in awe. We would also have elected to rid
ourselves of the thoughts that pervaded our minds. Through the
night I stared into the darkness, until it was no longer dark
anymore. I tossed and turned devoid of sleep and restless. My neck
stiffened and baked with tension making it impossible to rest my
head. They made being awake intolerable, constantly petrified by
premonitions and an elevated state of alertness. My sheets soaked
in sweat. Around 2am I jumped out of bed to take a hot shower
hoping it would calm me down. However, my shoulders remained as
firm as steel, the anxiety worsened and the sweat found new pyjamas
to soak. Cutting was not an option since it had the effect of
making me alert, I couldn’t also bet on the low possibility of
adverse effects. As I jumped to my desk scratching,
hyperventilating, fidgeting and trembling, my thoughts grew darker
and the night seemed to be stretched to infinity just to torment
me. I rushed to my window, climbed on the windowsill so my feet
dangle outwards. My right-hand hand grabbing the frame, I looked
down, so eager to jump and end it because I felt like I would
implode if I endured a second of the confusion, the anxiety and the
hurt. Tears blurred my sight, a teardrop fell from my left eye and
I watched it drop into the darkness and out of my sight where a bed
of daffodils and tulips waited. Tonight they will be drinking
blood , I remember thinking. There was no fear or hesitation
only the delight in having found the answer. Even if this was a
temporary problem of sorts, all my mind knew and could think was
that I wanted the feeling gone, and I wanted that now.
    “Okay, I should
count to three!” I whispered to myself.
    “One, two - “
Then an idea shot through my brain, I should go out to a
song...I should play a song.
    I gazed at the
computer sizing the effort it would take for me to get there and if
it was worth the trouble at all. Then something shinny caught my
eye past the computer on the bookshelf. It was the glass of beer I
had never touched, then I remembered I still had three bottles of
beer to myself packed away in the common fridge.
    I should drink,
that will help.
    Then it dawned
on me how stupid I almost became. The solution was right there and
I had almost walked past it into death. The beer would at least
carry me through to the morning and then I could be alive for the
meeting I have with Macxermillio and Macfearson. I knew