Read Safe Word for Free Online Page B

instantly. I let my head fall back as I stared up at the peeling, cracking paint on the ceiling. Good. A moment of fucking peace. My vision blurred as I tried to rationalize what was happening.
    I stopped looking for Rose years ago, forcing myself to believe she was long dead. The odds had been stacked against her since she was a kid. Regardless of who that woman was locked in the spare bedroom,
my
Rose
was
dead. This was no different from any other job I had done in the past. Although I had never had to down half a bottle of Jack to be able to do this before. There were rules, and as long as everyone stuck to them, we parted ways.
    My head was completely fucked and she was the reason. She was always the reason. My eyes continued to blur, but now out of sadness and loss.
    “This is all your fucking fault,” I mumbled as I leaned forward and rested my head in my hands. “All of this!” I yelled as my emotions began to spill over and I lost any semblance of control.
    “I’m sorry!” Her voice was full of tears, like mine. That only infuriated me further.
    “Not yet, darlin’, but you will be.” I gritted my teeth and pushed myself off the couch. I didn’t want to deal with the pain; I wanted to fucking drown it — kill off any part of my heart that still beat for her.
    Everything went sideways leaning on the white laminate countertop to support myself. I ran my hand over my mouth as I tried to focus. My head was screaming to take Rose and drop her off a few miles away, but my heart and my cock wanted more from her than even I was willing to admit.
    I had no control when it came to her, and it landed me in trouble on more than one occasion.
    How was it possible for her to have this control over me after all of this time? What about her was so fucking special?
    “What’s wrong, babe?” I pressed my forehead against hers as she struggled to calm herself down. My fingers slipped into the belt loops of her jeans, and I pulled her body closer as her eyes drifted closed.
    “I don’t want to talk about it. Just make me forget,” she whispered, her minty breath blew over my lips and I sucked in a ragged breath, inhaling her.
    “What do you want me to do, Rose? Tell me how to make you better.” I ran my fingers over her cheekbone, causing her chocolate eyes to flutter before they opened, locked on mine.
    “Touch me.” Her voice wavered but her eyes did not. I let my fingers slide back into her soft hair, gripping it between my fingers as I pressed my lips against hers. Soft and gentle at first, until her mouth began to move with mine, coaxing something deeper, begging for more. I let my tongue glide over her lower lip, soft and sweet. Her taste was intoxicating. She sighed as her lips fell open and her head lay back against my hand. I held her firmly against my mouth as I kissed away her sadness. She made me forget about the world, my life, my own pain.
    “I don’t deserve you.” I pulled back to catch my breath as I slid my nose along her throat, washing myself in her flowery scent. I loved that I could smell her on me hours after I left her. It kept me level, kept me from thinking of only myself.
    “Don’t say that,” Rose whispered as her hand came up to glide over my cheek. I smiled, grabbing her hand and placing a kiss on her palm before nipping it with my teeth.
    “It’s true,” I replied. She smiled as she tugged her hand back from my mouth, but I squeezed it, not letting her pull away from me. “You make me so fucking crazy.”
    Her eyes drifted from mine to my mouth and she took a small step closer, pushing her body against mine. I couldn’t help my physical reaction whenever she was near. I wanted her, every piece of her. I would have waited until the end of time if that was what she needed.
    Her free hand slipped between us and she pushed against my jeans, feeling how hard I had become for her. She giggled, loving to tease me. My breath caught in my throat as I struggled not to push her against