are
scared. They are not controlled by monthly ceremonies.”
She looked at me with confusion. What
I said was a little over her head and she didn’t quite understand.
She was only four years old.
“You’ll understand one day,” I told
her. “Trust me. There is so much to learn, so many fun things. Boys
on the outside… they dress different. Their hair is short.”
Sophie gasped. “Do the girls have
short hair?”
“Some.”
Another gasp. “I want to keep my long
hair.”
I ran my fingers down her golden
locks. “You will.”
“Are we safe, Vala?”
“Of course.”
“Are bad things coming?”
“No. I will always make sure you are
safe.”
“Promise?”
I leaned forward and kissed her on
the forehead. “I promise.”
“Why would Nito say you will make us
hurt?”
“Nito is a fool…”
Mother must have been listening,
because she gasped from where she stood in the doorway. “Vala!
Enough. Let her sleep.”
That was the extent of the
conversation. As if she were mad at me, she walked away.
What grudge would my mother hold
against me?
I told a story to Sophie, one about a
little furry man named ALF. After a hundred questions, she yawned
and went to sleep. I tucked her in and kissed her.
After watching her a little while, I
walked to the living area.
My mother again was pacing and
looking out the window. She had done that all throughout the
evening meal. She was nervous about the neighbors and she still
really hadn’t spoken to me yet. She hadn’t welcomed me back,
embraced me, or asked me anything.
“What are you doing?” I asked
her.
“They’re watching the house,” she
said.
“Let them watch. It isn’t like they
are going to bring torches and burn the house to the ground.”
“You don’t know that.”
I laughed in sarcasm. “They are sheep
to Nito. She doesn’t want me dead, she just wants me at any cost.
Of course, this is something you already know.”
“What do you mean?” she asked.
I shook my head and moved to sit on a
chair.
“Vala, answer me.”
“People will do anything to make sure
she gets me. Including my own mother.”
“I beg your pardon. How dare you talk
to me like that. As if I would sell you—”
“Wouldn’t you?”
“No.”
“How about giving her your blood in
good faith? Or taking bribes?”
My mother gasped. “Where did you hear
such things? Iry? Did Iry say this to you? He makes up tales.”
I bolted from the chair and ran to my
mother, taking hold of her arm, unfolding it to expose the blood
withdraw wounds. “Do his ‘tales’ cause this?”
“V-Val, I-I did this to keep you
safe,” my mother said, trembling. “I did this to keep her away from
you.”
“Did you?”
“Yes. Or else she would have hunted
you down.”
“Guess what? She did.”
My mother stepped back. “You are
speaking differently. Where were you?’
Again, I laughed. “Finally you ask?
You didn’t welcome me home, didn’t ask how I was. I’m going to bed.
Since I will be chosen tomorrow.”
I wasn’t tired, however, I
could tell my mother wasn’t being honest. I witnessed her betrayal
of me, and yet, I couldn’t tell her. It hurt. She was my mother and I loved
her, despite what she had done. I prayed there was an ounce of
truth in what she said, that she really did give her blood as a
distorted means to protect me.
“Where were you?”
I stopped. “With Davis.”
She blinked. “Davis?”
“You know, the man you left behind in
Angeles City? The man whose child you gave to the Sybaris?”
“It was our passage for a better
life. How dare you?’
“ No, how dare you ? You took his
child.”
“I wanted you to grow up. To be a
woman. To be safe. To not go hungry or be afraid.”
“So you sacrificed your own son?”
“I did so for you. For us. Davis
could not provide what we have here.”
“ You’re right. He would have
done much better for us. I was there. They aren’t vagrants or
runners, they live their lives. Much like we
Christopher Golden, James Moore