Read Retreat for Free Online Page B

shut and emptied my lungs of air, trying to drown in my dreamless sleep where everything hurt less.
    Eventually, though, I had to stop being so dramatic and get up. Life goes on, the world keeps revolving, and all of that, so I rolled out of bed and faced the day, slow as I was. I shuffled to the bathroom to pee but a different urge took over and I crouched over the toilet, vomiting the entire bottle of wine I’d imbibed the night before. Even after my stomach was completely empty, I stuck a finger down my throat and forced myself to throw up, to cleanse my body of everything that was making me hurt.
    It didn’t work. I only succeeded in getting the full-body shakes from the emptiness. I bent over the sink and gulped down water straight from the faucet, intent on filling that hollow ache inside. Then I climbed into the shower and washed myself, every movement, every swipe of the soapy loofah , symbolic of my need to cleanse myself of the memory of Henry.
    I was red and raw by the time I got out of the shower, but the memories remained. How could I possibly wash away someone who’s been a part of me since I was twelve years old? I’d have a better chance of forgetting myself.
    I dressed and walked out to the kitchen to eat a piece of toast to calm my stomach. I was filling my cup with coffee when I heard voices at the front of the house. One deep, gravelly voice in particular made me want to retch all over again.
    “Sir,” I heard Henry say as I crept closer. “I just wanted to have a word with you.”
    I peered around the corner and saw them standing in the foyer, my dad’s arms crossed across his chest and Henry standing in front of him with stooped shoulders, holding a paper sack in his hands. Henry was taller by several inches but in that moment, my dad seemed ten feet tall, quite literally the Lieutenant Colonel berating the Captain.
    “What did you do to my daughter?” Dad asked in that tone we both knew well, the very one that made us know we were in deep trouble.
    “Elsie and I broke up last night,” Henry said.
    “I gathered that much,” my dad said. “Though it seems to me like you did most of the breaking.”
    Henry looked down at his shoes. “I did, sir.”
    “You going to tell me why, son?”
    “It’s for her sake as much as mine,” Henry said, glancing around as if searching for words. “We grew up together. We are all that we know. Of course she fell in love with me, because I was always here. I just… I want to make sure she wants to be with me for the right reason.”
    Dad studied him for the longest time, his lips stiff. Finally he said, “And you think you might be with her for the wrong reasons?”
    I held my breath, waiting for Henry to deny it, but he didn’t. Of course he didn’t. “I’m not sure. That’s what I’m trying to find out.”
    Last night I didn’t think my heart could break any more, but right then, I felt as if Henry stepped on the shattered pieces and ground them into dust with his heel.
    I gathered what wits I had left and walked out from around the corner, trying to maintain a sense of dignity in my black sweatpants and TLC shirt.
    Henry started, looking a little panicked at the sight of me.
    “Elsie,” my dad said, his arms lowering to his sides. “Henry was just leaving.”
    Henry nodded then looked down at the sack in his hands. “I just wanted to give you this,” he said and held it out.
    I looked at the paper bag for the longest time, guessing at its contents. “You brought me a goodbye sandwich?”
    He shook the bag. “Just take it. Don’t open it until you get on the plane.”
    I grabbed it and immediately looked inside. “A voice recorder and a few tapes?”
    He gave a short nod. “Yeah. Doc Gal taped our sessions so I could go back and listen to them. She thought it might help me.”
    “So you want me to bring this back to OKC for you?” I asked. “Because you’re out of space in your luggage?”
    His nose was flaring in irritation when