take notice. “Gus?” The reigning Mrs. Claus was a slim, serious male elf. It was popular opinion that he was one of the best, most organized Mrs. Clauses in history. So organized, in fact, he often covered quite a few of Santa’s responsibilities as well. Recently he’d taken over personnel operations of the various departments, which included tracking who came in to work on time. Gus’s deep voice was calm, but the strength behind it was evident. “Are you coming to work?” Bok glanced at the time. It was well after midday. Although no one in Bok’s department worked particularly normal hours, they were expected to be at their terminals a certain number per day. Christmas through June might be the off-season for the reindeer, but acquisitions’ work was never done. Too many kids in the world—buying for them couldn’t be put off until the last moment.
“Yes, sir.” Bok hauled himself out of his bed even as he spoke. “I’m on my way now.”
“Good. One of the network segments is down. Work with Cam to figure it out.” Bok couldn’t even get another “yes, sir” out before the line was dead. He tossed the phone aside, letting it disappear in midair, and headed for his dresser.
“This is good,” he muttered to himself, shaking out a worn but comfortable dark blue tunic. “Work will get your mind off of her.”
Yes. If he said it enough, he might even believe it.
* * * *
She found him at his desk just fifteen minutes shy of the end of his shift. Which was remarkable since it was one in the morning. Or, judging from the skimpy little black party dress she wore over black-and-orange-striped tights, maybe the timing was perfect for her.
“How’s my favorite go-to guy?” she asked, slinking around the edge of his desk. The slight slur in her voice suggested she might have had a bit too much sleighberry wine. Her hair was bound in a tail that stuck straight up from her head, but abundant tendrils had escaped to frame her face and throat.
“Tanty.” Was he hallucinating?
“That would be me.” She sauntered right over to his side, her strappy sandals dangling from one hand. Without bothering to ask or warn him, she pulled back his wheeled chair and draped herself over his lap. Luckily, she was slim enough to fit, and she didn’t seem to mind working around his bulk as she wrapped one arm around his neck. “Hi.”
“Hi.” Then, when it didn’t look like she was going to respond: “What are you doing here?” Disregarding his question, she glanced at the three 27-inch monitors in front of him.
Thankfully, he’d not brought up any porn while he was multitasking that shift. It was all toy and novelty sites with carts in various states of completion. “Wow.” She sat up and leaned toward one of the monitors to take a better look. He was pretty sure she wasn’t that fascinated with toy robots, but she showed avid interest. “Wow. I never realized what, exactly, you did.” She waved a hand at the screens before them. “What’s all this?” “Toy Web sites.”
“You buy from these?”
“Yes.”
“In bulk? Wouldn’t humans get suspicious?”
“Yes, they would. That’s why we don’t buy in bulk. We’ve got a number of bogus accounts and credit cards, and we rotate them constantly.” They also often created new ones. The elves had always kept themselves toward the forefront of human technology, and the Internet had provided a tremendous boon for them, possibly more dramatic than it had been for the other world. The ready, anonymous availability of movies and television shows alone had completely altered life in Santa’s Village. Some might argue for the worse, but Bok wasn’t one of them.
Tanty stared at the screens another minute, then looked back at him like she’d never seen him. “You buy stuff like this all day?”
Unable to take her direct look, he reached over her to a touchpad to click through a cart that would expire if he left it idle too long. “Yeah.” She
The League of Frightened Men
Adele Huxley, Savan Robbins