purple colored beneath her eyes, her face pinched. I wanted nothing more than to pull her to me and hug her, like we had that day at Sudeley, but Jane was not one to be consoled, nor would she want me to pity her. Her eyes narrowed, perhaps seeing the thoughts crossing my countenance.
“Do not pity me, dear sister.” Her voice was soft, not at all how I was used to her. For a n instant, the girl I’d once known returned. “We shall both bear a similar fate.”
A swift wind blew. My lips parted in question, but I need not speak, for Jane continued close to my ear as the barge lurched forward, both of us gripping the rail. “The king is sick. He will soon go with God, and I’ve been told I shall be queen. ’Tis not my place, Kat, ’tis not what I want, but it may be what God wills.”
“But— ” My voice came out a little shrill.
“Hush, do not make a scene.” Her eyes flicked to the servants and to our parents , who both stared out over the river onto the landscape.
London ’s tightly woven together timber buildings with wattle and daub sat amongst immaculate grand brick or stone homes and palaces. Smoke curled up from buildings, and birds flew in circles around the tops of the bridges. I shuddered, recalling the heads those birds were most likely feasting on.
“ I am doing my duty for God. For country. For England. ’Tis what King Edward wants. What his father, our great uncle, proclaimed.” Jane paused, as if in thought. “Princess Mary is most unforgiving. She is displeased with being ousted from the line. I fear when things fall into place, Mary will not let us live, knowing we are a threat to her succession.” Jane turned her gaze toward the opposite shore. “Perhaps I shall not be a wife for long.”
I felt sick. My head pounded , and the grayish sun was suddenly too bright. Why did Jane sound so certain? Mother would not let us die…would she?
“Jane, ’tis only wedding jitters weighing upon your soul. Come, let us be merry today! You shall be a wife! And to a handsome courtier!” I attempted to cheer her, though my own mind was bleak.
Jane smiled bitterly, a puff of breath escaping her lips. “Oh, Kat, you are so naïve.”
I had only been trying to cheer her , hoping her future husband’s handsomeness was at least pleasing, if his bloodline was not. I gave Jane a bright smile, hoping to ease one from her. “Not so young. You forget, I am to be married, too.”
Jane ’s eyes clouded, and her face cleared of emotion. “Aye, and the only one between us marrying someone worthy of a princess of the blood.”
I wanted to ask her why Mother and Father had insisted on Guildford Dudley as her groom. I wanted to know why they were so insistent on a marriage between me and Pembroke’s heir. Why now? Why the urgency? But I didn’t ask. I don’t know if it was because I was afraid of the answer, or because her eyes had become distant as she looked down into the river as it passed us by.
We arrived at the quay outside Durham, greeted by an army of servants who led us into the house. I was overwhelmed by the number of guests, the formalities. The triple wedding was lavish. The ceremony long. My groom’s palms sweaty and his pallor sickly. He informed me he’d just risen from his sick bed and that if it were up to him, he would have remained in it. There was no added remark about how long, causing me to believe he might have died there rather than marry me. Part of me wished he had stayed abed, as I would now have to worry overmuch about catching whatever illness he had. Good thing I’d had the sense to tell Mrs. Helen to pack the herbs, flowers and roots I dabbled with in making mixtures for healing, a hobby since I was old enough to pick flowers. And a hobby that had helped to heal many of our tenants.
The feast, dancing, and entertainm ents went well into the evening—our hosts doing their utmost to showcase their wealth. Every courtier was present, and it had even been rumored that