that. “It’s not punishment, just cautiousness. I’m doing what I think is best for my family.” She cleared her throat. “Can I ask you a question?”
He nodded dropping his head down to look at Micah.
“Did you know you were moving out here when we were together in Maui?”
“I had lunch with Brian and Julie in Hawaii after you left. I mentioned to him that I was thinking of leaving Nashville. He suggested Santa Rosa.” He lifted his eyes to meet hers. “My turn.”
Her heart did a little skip and she nodded in agreement.
“How did you feel when you got on that plane in Hawaii to go home?”
Ali propped her elbow on the table and rested her head in her hand. She remembered distinctly how she felt when she boarded her plane. The reminder made her stomach flip-flop. She’d never felt like that in her life. She’d only stayed in Hawaii for a couple of days. Johnny had begged her to stay for a few more, but at two months old, she couldn’t bear leaving Micah for that long. Johnny had another week before going home, but he insisted on taking her to the airport. Said he didn’t want her to go alone.
They’d stayed up all night, even watched the Maui sunrise together. The night reminded her of being a teenager, fighting sleep to stay on the phone with a boy…talking about everything, yet talking about nothing important. Simply being together was enough for them in the moment. It was such a great night. She’d never forget how she felt being there with him. “Why would you ask me that?”
“I answered your question, you answer mine.”
“Honestly.” Her voice lowered and her eyes focused on her plate. “Crazy…exhilarated, and scared, and free, and sad, and special, and miserable, and…loved…all at the same time.” Ali frowned and wanted to cry. She shook it off and stood to clear their plates, almost knocking her chair to the ground in her rush to get up. Their night together had been a wonderful break from her regular everyday troubles and her regular everyday life…but it wasn’t real life, and she couldn’t pretend differently. She was a wreck of a woman, with a new baby and a pending divorce.
“Ali,” he said as she stepped to the sink. “How about when you got home—when you got back to Santa Rosa?”
“Why do you want to know this? It doesn’t change anything.” she said, slamming the plates into the sink.
“Did you feel lost…lonely? Like you had just walked away from something you would never feel again?”
Ali looked up to find him standing right next to her. “How—”
“How did I know?” he asked before she could get her sentence out.
Ali stared at him not sure what to say. “How do you?”
“Because I felt exactly the same way. Watching you fly away killed me.” He leaned his hip on the kitchen counter, cradling the sleeping baby in his left arm. “When I got home to Nashville, I felt sick with it.”
Ali forced herself to focus with him standing so close. He’d trapped her with his mesmerizing blue eyes and thick lashes. His gaze pulled her in, held her there, and wouldn’t let go.
“A week after I got home from Hawaii, I got a call from Brian’s boss and knew what I wanted, where I wanted to be, and who I wanted to be with.”
Johnny reached his hand up and cupped her neck, pulling her closer, staring at her, his breath a whisper on her mouth…and she couldn’t pull away. He kissed her so gently and so tenderly, little electric pulses erupted throughout her body and she worried Johnny might feel it vibrating within her. Thankfully Micah made a space between them, because she didn’t think she could’ve kept her hands off him without a barrier.
As if on cue, Micah stirred in Johnny’s arms. Ali pulled away and the heated expression in Johnny’s eyes must have matched her own. To busy her hands, she reached for Micah.
“No, please don’t,” Johnny whispered, resting Micah’s head on his shoulder. He swayed around the kitchen with Micah