ones when she was growing up. Her father didn’t suddenly appear, and she tiptoed the rest of the way to the solid oak door of her mother’s bedroom. She knocked softly on the door and, hearing no reply, quietly let herself in.
When her mother was gripped with illness, her father made all the necessary arrangements for her to live on the ground floor of their home. An old parlor room, once home to poker chips and billiard tables, had been retrofitted into her new chambers, complete with an easily accessible personal bathroom. The floor-to-ceiling windows looked out over the city to the south and green pastures to the west, and they were tinted at such an angle that the setting sun would not disturb her sleep.
Stephanie Brüding was a shadow of her former self. She lay prostrate in her bed, her head propped up by a multitude of pillows. Her face was blank and expressionless, and her eyes stared vacantly toward the windows. If she heard Alex enter the room, she gave no indication of it.
“Mom?” Alex called. No response. She walked closer to the bed and raised her voice. “Mom, it’s me, Alex.”
A flicker of movement, and then Stephanie’s head turned toward her daughter. Alex felt a pang in her chest. There was no recognition in those eyes, only a mild interest in the new person in the room.
“It’s Alex,” she repeated, moving to sit on the edge of the bed. From the doorway, she could have pretended that her mother was the same as she’d remembered from her childhood. Up close, she could see the effects of the disease on her mother’s body. She had lost a lot of weight, an unhealthy amount, and her cheekbones and jaw stood out prominently. Her eyes were sunken and watery, and her skin had aged prematurely. Gray was now the dominant color of what was left of her hair.
Alex swallowed her misgivings and reached out to one of Stephanie’s gnarled, bony hands. It was clammy, but she smiled into her mother’s eyes. “It’s so nice to see you,” she said, her lie dripping with warmth. She wanted to see her, but never like this. It was the old Stephanie that she wished were here right now.
Stephanie’s face broke out into a smile. “Oh, you too, sweetie,” she said. “Yes, it’s very nice to see you.”
Alex seriously doubted that her mother knew who she was anymore, but she nodded. “It’s a beautiful day outside. Would you like to see it?”
Her mother fussed with her blanket. “Oh, I don’t know. I’m so tired today, perhaps another time.”
“Okay,” Alex said, patting her hand. She didn’t know what else to do, so she just rubbed the leathery skin of her mother’s hand as they stared outside. Her taxi was waiting for her, but she knew that these moments were limited; a few months from now, her father would be a widower.
“Now that is love,” said a voice from the doorway. She looked up, startled, only to see Kern standing in the doorway. He had a stupid grin on his face, one that somehow made him seem younger and older at the same time.
Kern, you sly dog, she thought. So you did hear Father at lunch. He was wrong, though. Alex wasn’t doing this out of love for her mother, only pity and a sense of obligation. She returned his smile, though, since that was what he was expecting, and then turned back to her mother. “Mom,” she said, leaning in toward that withered face. “Kern is going to keep you company now.”
Her head bobbed, possibly in agreement. Alex didn’t dare make contact with her mother’s mind.
“Thank you,” Alex said to Kern. She stood and offered her mother one last smile, but Stephanie’s attention was elsewhere. She followed her gaze, which landed somewhere on the wall between two windows. “I’ll be back when I can,” she murmured.
“Your company is always a pleasure,” Kern said.
I bet, she thought, with my mother like that. Even her small amount of time with the woman had been unnerving, and Alex made her way back to the foyer, completely