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was feeling extremely frustrated. I could feel that I was about to get caught up in too much nonsense.
    What could I do? What should I do?
    I heard my father moving around the house as he prepared to go work. I thought about just going downstairs and speaking to him. Unlike many black males, I actually had a father, and he was a daddy at that. Maybe he could add some direction and just help me see things clear and in their proper perspective.
    I was about to make my way downstairs to talk with my father but I changed my mind as I reminded myself once again, no conscience.
    I tried to relax and I slowly made my way back into the bed. Before I fell asleep, I prayed.
    â€œDear Lord, please let me, my mother, my father, my brother, my sister, Sabine, and everyone else that I love, like, and respect be OK. Thank you, Lord, for letting me have such a wonderful day that just passed. Please, Lord, continue to let me have nice days. Thank you for life. I love you so much. Oh . . . P.S. Lord, please help us that are in the crew, watch over us, Lord, please. In your Son’s name, Jesus Christ, I pray. Amen.”

Kingpins
    â€œMark, the telephone. Mark! . . . Mark! The telephone!” my sister yelled.
    â€œYeah, a’ight, a’ight,” I responded in a grouchy voice. “Paula, why couldn’t you just tell whoever it is that I was sleeping? Can’t you see that I’m tired!? Man!”
    â€œMark, just pick up the damn phone and shut the hell up!” Paula said, sounding very disgusted.
    I went on to angrily explain that it was Saturday morning and that I never woke up until at least one in the afternoon on Saturdays.
    â€œHello, who the hell is this!?” I rudely asked when I finally picked up the phone.
    â€œYo, Holz, it’s me, man. It’s Latiefe.”
    â€œLatiefe? What do you want this early? It’s like eight o’clock in the morning!”
    â€œHolz I don’t care what time it is!” Latiefe responded authoritatively. “All I know is that you better get up, nigga, ’cause at ten o’clock we’re all meeting at my grandmother’s house.”
    â€œFor what?” I asked as I finally began to wake up.
    â€œYou know for what . . . I’m sayin’. Remember what we talked about this week?”
    â€œOh you mean . . .”
    â€œYeah, kid, that’s what I mean,” Latiefe quickly interrupted. “It’s on. A’ight? We’re all going out to breakfast like big time Mafioso.”
    â€œA’ight, bet,” I said. “I’ll be there, no diggidy. Peace.”
    Before Latiefe hung up, he sternly warned me to get dressed and not to go back to sleep.
    At ten o’clock we were to discuss how we were going to build an empire of illegal activities that was gonna get us paid during the summer of ninety-one. I was very tired. I knew that the meeting was important, but the bed was calling my name. I rolled back into bed, pulled the sheet over my head, and before I knew it, I was knocked out—sound asleep.
    When I finally did wake up, I realized that it was five minutes to ten. I couldn’t believe it. I lost total control as I scrambled to get up and out of the house. I darted to the bathroom, brushed my teeth, hopped in and out of the shower, raced back to my room, and threw on some clothes. I was out the door.
    By the time I’d finally made it out the house it was about ten fifteen. I jetted to Tee’s grandmother’s crib. Most of the crew members were already there and waiting. Donnie, Erik, Randy, Tee, Dwight, Kwame, and J.P. were all there. Earl and Wiggie were also there. Although they were originally from 229th Street, you might as well have considered them as part of Fourth Crew. See, Earl lived in the same house as Dwight and Latiefe because he was the father of Latiefe’s aunt’s baby. Latiefe’s aunt was Audrey. They all lived with Tee’s grandmother. Confusing, right? Even I