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and not a body to be fucked. He’d been the same way the first night we were together, making sure he wasn’t taking advantage of my grief, asking me to his home instead of an impersonal hotel. I decided I liked that instinct for consideration in him.
    Still, though, casual sex would be easier if you got right down to it. Sitting and talking beforehand seemed to call attention to it.
    “So are you going to talk dirty to me or what?” I asked at last, masking my self-consciousness with irony.
    He laughed, low in his throat. Then said with a clever, teasing expression, “I’m going to fuck your hot, little pussy so hard you’ll be begging for mercy.”
    Maybe the words would have turned me on in a different context, but sitting in his living room with a glass of wine, combined with the wry amusement in his eyes, they made me giggle. “Be careful or you’ll turn me into a puddle of lust with that kind of talk.”
    “I’m all for puddles of lust.”
    We shared a smile, and I felt comfortable enough to ask him something I really wanted to know. “So why are you so against serious relationships?”
    He gave a half-shrug and slouched slightly in his chair. “They’re just not what I want.”
    “Yeah, I get that, but there’s usually a reason if someone has decided against them on principle. Did some beautiful woman break your heart?” I kept my tone light because I knew the question might be too personal.
    “No.” He was smiling still, and his tone was as light as mine had been. “To tell you the truth, I don’t think I’ve ever been in love.”
    “Never?”
    “Oh, I’ve been into women before, but I’m not sure if it was really love. I had a girlfriend all through college. I guess she was my most serious relationship. But we broke up mutually when I went to Africa after graduation. Since then…” He shrugged again.
    I wasn’t oblivious to the fact that he still hadn’t answered my question. I normally wouldn’t have pushed it. I’m just not a pushy person, and I’m usually good at picking up on back-off vibes from other people. But I was here right now because I was determined to be someone else—someone who didn’t have regrets about holding back out of fear. That should apply to conversation as well as sex.
    So I said, “Sometimes long-term relationships don’t happen for people, and that’s fine. But it seems like you’ve made a conscious decision against them—and, in my experience, there’s usually a reason for people to do that.”
    “Yeah.” He’d been looking at me as we talked, but now he glanced away, over toward the other side of the room. “But people are different. And I’ve found that I’m better off alone.”
    That was more of an answer, but it wasn’t a very good one. I wanted to know more about him. About what was going on beneath the strong, easy-going, sexy surface. But I could recognize a final word when I heard one, so I let the topic drop.
    We weren’t here to bare our souls. We were here to get fucked.
    “What about you?” he asked, sounding more like himself. “Why aren’t you in a serious relationship?”
    I gave a huff of dry laughter. “You think I can just stand on a street corner and announce that I’m ready for a relationship so the love of my life should come and find me?”
    His blue eyes lingered on my face before they slid down to my body. “I can’t believe you’d have trouble finding a man.”
    I almost choked on the irony. “Are you serious? Men have never lined up to go out with me. In fact, no one has even asked me out in months.”
    His eyebrows drew together as he gazed at me. His eyes were so thoughtful and so searching—and the look went on for so long—that I shifted in my seat, feeling exposed, strangely conscious of my body. “What?” I demanded at last.
    “I’m just trying to figure out why guys aren’t asking you out. You are so gorgeous.”
    My cheeks warmed with pleasure, although I still felt like squirming. “I am