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was wide awake. And very troubled. She had expected the intercourse to be uncomfortable, even painful, and she'd steeled herself for that. In her wildest dreams she would never have imagined she might find pleasure. It was disturbing and added to her already formidable self-loathing.
    She moved to draw the blanket over her, then stopped suddenly. Between her legs was sore and sticky wet. Moving quietly, she rose from the pallet and went to the fire. She carefully added branches to the barely glowing embers and coaxed the flame back to life. After a minute or two, she settled some water on to heat.
    While she waited for the water to warm, Mieli watched Jai. He was large and intimidating even in his sleep, his frame thickly padded with muscle in a way that was not natural for her people. She remembered how powerful and immovable his strength had felt while he used her body, and she found herself on the brink of tears.
    She'd tried to be clinical and detached, but with her body still sore and aching, she only felt vulnerable and scared. He had not hurt her, but that didn't mean he couldn't. Only a fool would blithely assume he had no other intentions for her. In the moment she had felt that they had reached some affinity, but what if she was wrong? What if he didn't need or want her anymore and he just left again?
    His body was whole. After a single day alone, he had healed his wounds completely. Obviously, her skills as a doctor were nothing compared to what any soldier could do.
    The one hope left for her was that he would take her with him. If she wanted him to do so, her role was clear. A doctor he didn't need; a bedmate he might be persuaded to take.
    Her studies of behavioral medicine had taught her well, and she knew that to maintain some control in their relationship, she had to distinguish herself from a victim. When he made sexual demands, she knew she must consent, even make demands of her own. But she had not been truly prepared tonight, and the most important part had nearly been forgotten. To establish a relationship and possibly engender some feeling from him, she must not only allow him to do what he wanted but act as if it were her choice as well.
    All was not lost, though. She had unexpectedly found pleasure in the act, and that seemed to have worked. There had been a change in him, and afterward he had seemed more interested in her, asking her name and giving her his when he could have just turned away. He even expected they would continue to sleep together.
    Over the fire the water had begun to boil. She carefully added a bit to the pail of cold water at her side and with a small cloth from her pack bathed her body in the firelight. The warmth of the water soothed her tender nipples. They were hardened from the cool night air and sensitive from Jai's vigorous attentions.
    The slippery flesh of her labia and upper thighs was a testament to the length of his orgasm. She'd never felt anything like what had happened to him when he peaked. The cum she wiped away was thick and white, and once it was gone, she felt much better. The act itself had been mildly traumatic; the evidence was no less so.
    It felt to Mieli as though she had passed some invisible barrier between the person she had been and the woman she was becoming in this new world. She had given herself sexually in order to gain favor with Jai, and she would do it again if necessary. What was more, she could easily imagine now that she might give herself over to anyone who would help her achieve her goals. There was something about this first time, though, that she would never forget.
    When she was done wiping away the residue of their coupling, she rinsed the cloth and laid it out to dry. Mieli felt suddenly that she either must lie down to sleep or give in and cry her heart out. Overwhelmed by her feelings and the events of the day, she crawled back onto the pallet and pulled up the blanket. With Jai on his back next to her, there was very little room,