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grabbing my hand and dragging me toward his house.
    Got in his house and was confronted with vision from About a Boy as Mom was on couch, unconscious with vomit on floor next to her.
    Ackity ack ack!!!
    I hate vomit; I hate the sight and smell of it. I started to gag immediately in automatic response but then heard Rory crying and Cosmo whining. Realized I was the adult in this situation and had to act.
    I walked up to the woman and put my hand on her forehead while telling Rory to call 999.
    I lifted her up as best I could and shook her a little. She was warm and breathing (thank goddess) but she was dead weight and I kept wracking my brain but in spite of superwitchdom and Chosen One Prophesy, in all honesty, I didn’t know what to do.
    Furthermore, didn’t have my wand.
    Furthermore, was uncertain about magic in front of Rory as didn’t want to screw up and levitate Mom only to drop her on the floor or something. I doubt SuperWitch is supposed to tinker with the undeveloped psyche of eight year olds.
    So, I thought about the black dragon.
    Then I took my cue from movies (don’t they spend a lot of time researching these things?) and continued shaking her and started slapping her gently around the face and talking loudly to her.
    When Rory got back, I said, “Rory honey, go get me a glass of water… hurry.”
    Then I thought about the black dragon again.
    (I know what you’re thinking but what else could I do?)
    Rory brought the water, I threw it in her face, she groaned, moaned and her head lolled around and then nothing.
    I thought of the black dragon again. (Bloody Sebastian was taking his time.)
    I got a big pan of water and threw it in her face and this time she began mumbling with more lolling. I asked Rory where the bathroom was and with a herculean effort (I thought) I dragged her off the couch and halfway across the room when Sebastian strolled in (yes, strolled , ack!). He took one look at me dragging the woman across the floor and asked, “What’s going on?”
    I wanted to say, “We’re dancing,” but instead I just bugged my eyes out at him and then gestured to Rory and thought, “Suicide,” in my head hoping he’d catch my drift and then…
    “Fuck,” he muttered.
    No kidding.
    “Did you call 999?” he asked as he pulled her out of my arms and picked her up like she weighed about five pounds.
    “Of course I did.” What does he think I am, a moron? (Don’t answer that.)
    He dumped her in the tub, turned on the shower and gently slapped her about the face. I could have told him that water and slappage were not really working but then she mumbled some more and opened her eyes (of course, Sebastian dousing and slapping her would work).
    She took awhile to focus on Sebastian then looked at me and then said, “Help me.”
    Straight out, she said it.
    “Help me.”
    Yay!
    If that’s not permission to meddle then nothing is.
    Then she said, “They’re trying to kill me. You have to take care of Rory.”
    Sebastian looked at me, I looked at Sebastian and the Mom started sobbing.
    Then the ambulance people came and took her away.
    * * * * *
    Sebastian and I took Rory (in Sebastian’s lush platinum-colored Jaguar XJS) to hospital.
    * * * * *
    Her name is Josephine McShane (I grabbed her purse before getting in Lush Jag and I looked through her wallet) and hospital people told us she’d taken a whole load of pills.
    Stuffy person arrived and asked if we were family (while glancing indiscreetly at Rory).
    I pinched the back of Sebastian’s arm and said yes, we were his Auntie Mathilda and Uncle Ash (good nickname, eh? – took me awhile to come up with that one but one cannot keep saying (or writing) Sebastian all the time – too much) and we’d most certainly look after Rory.
    Sebastian did not appear too happy (but may have pinched pretty hard, er… accidentally).
    Hospital people came back out and told me Josephine wanted to talk to me.
    When I arrived in her room, she looked exhausted,