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whisper, a soft murmur that didn't carry far on the night air. "It was easier. Every time we went out into town there would be these girls hanging around. And a lot of them would flock around me. It was crazy."
    Jacob looked at Daniel's profile in the pale moonlight and thought the girls were really pretty sane from his point of view.
    "After a while I had a reputation as a ladies' man. If the guys got really pushy, ragging on me, I'd pick out the shyest pretty girl in the club and take her out. We'd have some fun, and then I'd take her home, maybe kiss for a while, and then I'd tell her about this girl back home I was being faithful to. I'd tell this girl how if I ever was going to stray it would have been with her, but she had to help me be strong. And I'd beg her not to tell anyone. Worked like a charm."
    "You never... just tried it anyway? With a girl?"
    "I couldn't. It was odd, being out with a gal. I'd watch her ass or her cheek and get hard and think 'this is it, I can do this.’ And then she'd laugh with that high voice or brush her tits on me and..." He shook his head.
    "And once training was over?"
    Daniel glanced around and said in a whisper, "I thought maybe. Maybe in Hawaii. The service club there had a room where you could sit and be around the guys, be quiet, listen to some records. It was supposed to be queer-central. But I didn't get up the nerve before the Japs hit. Afterward everyone was too busy and too sad. So I figured Frisco would be it. Go out with the fellows for a while and then sheer off and find someplace more friendly. But there was a gal flirting with me from the beginning, cute blonde with tits out to here." Daniel demonstrated with cupped hands. "So I did the same thing, took her out, had a good time, begged off to be honorable to the girl back home." His lip curled in self-disgust. "She wanted to do it anyway. She kept saying how my girl would never have to know, and it was unnatural to expect a guy to be celibate for years. She practically had her hand down my pants. But I couldn't go through with it."
    "I'm glad," Jacob said, and felt himself blush again.
    "Me too."
    For a long time they sat silently. The ship rose and fell under them with the pull and ebb of the water. The deck hummed with the odd asynchronous spin of her screws, offset enough to avoid the steady rhythm that would call the Jap subs to her. Men a dozen yards away on the deck snored or muttered, a low restless backdrop. And yet in their little sheltered corner, Jacob felt like they owned a private world.
    The clouds disappeared and the moonlight brightened. The waves got a little higher though, lifting the Gageway and then dropping her in a deep rocking motion. Daniel said, "We're headed for Australia."
    "I heard that. Have you ever been there?"
    "Nope. George says it's nice though. Some of the guys think we'll end up in Cid Harbour but George says Townsville and he's usually right."
    A slightly deeper plunge of the ship under them made Jacob ask, "You figure we'll make it all the way there?" They could both feel the way the Gageway was wallowing, deeper in the water than usual.
    "Sure. The pumps are keeping up, at least mostly. And it's only a couple of days."
    "She'll need repairs."
    "Yeah. We should get liberty for sure, maybe even real leave." Daniel kept his head tipped up toward the sky and didn't look at Jacob as he asked, "You still interested in doing something?"
    For a second Jacob hesitated. He could change his mind? He'd thought he'd committed, in that dark airless space with his face pressed against Daniel's skin. And now unexpectedly Daniel was giving him the chance to take it back. But it was only a second of hesitation. Because Jacob had looked at every burned, bleeding and broken man who had been carried into sickbay with only one thought. Please, God, don't let it be Daniel. And each time it hadn't been. Damned if he was going to waste that gift.
    "Yeah. I'm still interested."
    "I'll ask, find us a place.