Read I'll Sing for my Dinner for Free Online Page B

rancher. I guess we would have stayed home if that were the case. Mary loved it, though. Dad figured that maybe she’d marry a man who wanted to ranch and they’d keep the place going.”
    “How old was Mary?” Cecily’s voice was almost a whisper.
    “Nineteen. I think I miss her most of all. You always expect your parents to go during your lifetime, but she had her whole life ahead of her.”
    “The same age I am,” Cecily said. “Three years ago, I was nineteen. She’d be twenty-two now. I’m so sorry, Jake.”
    I had thought Cecily might be even younger than that. But she had the same enthusiasm for life as Mary. Neither of them ever walked up or down the stairs. It always sounded as though they were in a race.
    It helped to think of her as Mary’s age. Mary was only thirteen when I shipped overseas the first time. A little girl. She had been eighteen the last time I saw her, at her high school graduation, so proud of her new smile with her braces off. The problem was that Cecily didn’t look like a little girl. She looked like someone I wanted to undress.
    But the problem of transportation remained. The ranch was twenty miles out in the country. Someone had to take her out there, or take her into town. I was dragging her around with me on all my errands, even to get a haircut.
    “I can teach you to drive. It’s not hard,” I said.
    Shaking her head, she said, “I really don’t want to. I guess it’s kind of a pain for you, though. As soon as I can get some money together, I’ll get an apartment in town.”
    “Even in town, Greeley isn’t New York. You need a car to get around. Don’t you get tired of having to go everywhere with me? It can’t be fun waiting for me all the time.”
    “I don’t mind,” she said. “I like being with you. But if you want to go someplace and don’t want to take me, I understand. Just leave me here, or at the bar, or dump me at a coffee shop or something. If I can get to a main road, I can always get to the bar on time to sing. It must feel sometimes as if you’re married, without any of the benefits. I’m sorry.”
    So was I. There was no doubt in my mind that I could have the benefits any time I asked. But it did feel good to hear her say she enjoyed being with me. It felt very good. Unfortunately, I had a feeling as to how she would get to the bar if Jared or I didn’t take her. I had no intention of putting her in a position where she felt she needed to hitchhike.
    And God help me, every time she mentioned getting an apartment, it felt like a knife through my heart. A wee bit fickle there, Jake? Want to eat your cake and have it too? We had only known each other a month, but I was convinced at times that if I asked her to marry me, she would only ask, how soon can we do it? My problem was that I caught myself daydreaming about a future with her. I hadn’t felt lonely before she showed up.
    If only I could get over the feeling that she was attracted to me because I was the only man who ever treated her like a human being. The way she looked at me sometimes was embarrassing. I’d seen that same look on the face of a teenaged girl meeting her rock star idol, and on the face of a nun praying to a crucifix. I was sure I was reading more into it than it deserved. Surely, it was impossible for me to be an object of worship. And the fact that I could even think that made me feel ashamed of myself.
    It wasn’t just my imagination that she was interested in crawling into my bed. I took her out riding, and it was obvious from the beginning that she had no idea how to ride a horse. But she liked it and was willing to work at it. The first day, we rode down by the creek. I took it easy, and Lightning wasn’t too happy about it. Maggie, however, was a perfect lady, until we got close to the creek and she could smell the water.
    Lightning broke into a trot, and Maggie followed him. I looked back and saw Cecily bouncing around in the saddle like a sack of flour. I winced.