Read Identity Thief for Free Online Page A

making a payment this evening?”
    “I won’t be making any payment because I never spent the money. I don’t even know who you people are. And I’ve never been late with a bill in my life.”
    “Are you saying, sir, that you are not Dr. Jesse Falcon?” She read off my social security number, my former address, and my current address.
    “Yes, but I sold that other property before you say my account was opened. I can prove it. Really, it wasn’t me.”
    “One moment, please.” She put me on hold. Annoyingly, there was a recording of someone like Robert Goulet singing, “The Impossible Dream.”
    After what seemed an eternity, Tiffany came back on the line. “I spoke to my supervisor, sir. She said we could mark your account as ‘pending further investigation.’ This means that what you need to do is show us proof that this account was never yours. Things like cancelled checks with your signature, proof of address, and a notarized letter will help. You may want to speak with an attorney, though hopefully that will not be necessary. You will have thirty days to provide us with this information.”
    “Thirty days from when ?” The letter, though it just arrived, was dated ten days earlier.
    “From today,” she said brightly, which I took as a good omen.
    “So you will not contact me in the meantime?” Though I had nothing to hide, threatening certified letters were a hassle I could live without, not to mention that I didn’t want to have to explain all this again to some other minimum wage ninny.
    “No, sir, we will not.”
    After getting off the phone, I ate some room temperature Thai food in silence. Esther was equally taciturn in the living room, looking over some possible sofa fabrics for a client.
    The next morning, I was not at all pleased to see Linda waiting for me at my office. “I have to talk to you,” she said.
    “Mrs. Goldstein, you are not scheduled until next week.”
    I looked meaningfully at my receptionist, who said, “I know, Doctor, I already reminded her.”
    “ Doctor, please, this is an emergency .” Linda hissed through clenched teeth.
    “Very well,” I sighed. “But my nine o’clock should be here soon.”
    I didn’t know what to expect from Linda, but as soon as I closed my office door to find out, my receptionist buzzed me, stating I had an urgent call.
    “Hello, my name is Mark,” said the voice from the credit company. “I am calling to collect a debt—”
    “Mark, look at my account,” I said, in a more forceful tone than the night before. “It should say, ‘pending further investigation.’” I went on about my talk with Tiffany, and how I would be sending out the materials requested.
    “Yes, I am familiar with accounts pending further investigation. But I see no PFI designation on your record.”
    “No what ?”
    Linda nuzzled me; I pushed her away in annoyance.
    “PFI—pending further investigation.”
    “That’s impossible.”
    “Sir, all I am showing is that your account is over ninety days past due. How would you like to make a payment today?”
    “I’m calling my lawyer.” I slammed down the phone. “Now, Mrs. Goldstein , what do you have to tell me?” I nearly shouted.
    Linda stared incredulously. “Why are you being mean? I’ve left Marty.”
    I could all but see my insides crash to the floor. Marty was her husband of twenty years. “What do you mean, left him? You mean you’re maybe thinking about possibly leaving him?”
    “No, I mean I left him. I told him last night it was over. That I’d found someone else.” She wiped away her tears and blew her nose into a Kleenex.
    “And who did you say this someone else was?” I grabbed her arm so hard she begged me to let go. But I didn’t.
    “I didn’t tell him, I swear.” She twisted free of my grip, rubbing her arm in self-pity. “Marty said he would kill this other guy.” She feebly and nervously touched my cheek.
    I felt like she was crowding me, and resisted.
    “Why are you