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now. Any kind of joy felt selfish after we lost Joey. As if I was forgetting him, betraying him by feeling any normal happiness.

‘I’ll ring the Talland Bay Hotel,’ Adam said briskly.

‘But you’ve just had lunch there,’ I laughed. ‘Don’t you want to try somewhere else?’

‘We haven’t been there together for dinner for years. And it’s quite romantic, don’t you think?’ I blushed. Adam smiled. ‘We’ll have a good meal there, if they can fit us in.’

They could. I had a bath, took care dressing. I wore a long black dress embellished with silver beading around the neck, and a beautiful gauzy evening coat embroidered with black silk roses, their petals sparsely but elegantly dotted with Swarovski crystals. I don’t know why I’d brought this outfit down with me. I hadn’t worn it for ages, but then again I hadn’t been on holiday, a proper carefree holiday, for six long years now.

The whole effect was somewhat over the top for dinner at a country hotel, but it made me feel glamorous. I hadn’t dressed up for what felt like a lifetime.

I dried my hair, styled it with a hot brush. I was punctilious with my make-up. I hadn’t bothered with all that for years, but putting on eyeliner, mascara and blusher gave me an odd thrill. As I finished with a rose-tinted lip gloss, I looked in the mirror and hardly recognised myself. I looked pretty and well; ten years younger than the wan grey ghost that normally haunted my home and school. I finished with a long spray of Jo Malone, and was ready to go.

Chapter Eleven

    As I walked downstairs to face Adam, I felt self-conscious. I wondered if I’d gone too far with the dress and the make-up. But his face as I joined him in the living room showed me why making the effort was worthwhile. He looked mesmerised. I realised I had made no attempt at all to court his love for five long years. He had been uncomplaining and totally patient with this shadow of a wife; a life-partner who had taken her eye off the ball because her main focus was her youngest son. Once he had gone, this wife was not interested in the rest of her world. Not in her other son, and certainly not in her husband – a man who had suffered the loss just as much as she; a man who needed comfort she could not provide.

‘You look lovely, Molly,’ he said softly.

‘Thanks. I feel a bit overdressed.’

‘Oh, no. It’s lovely. Perfect for me.’

‘Well, that’s what I hoped; to look good for you. I know it’s been too long since I made the effort.’

He shook his head. ‘That’s OK, darling. I know… well, I know how hard it’s been.’

‘For both of us, though,’ I replied. ‘Not just me. This…’ I looked bashfully down at my frock, a hint of cleavage peeping out for the first time in ages, ‘this is to say to you that I want to try and make our marriage work, like it used to. I’ve been unapproachable, I know. I’ve neglected you, us, for too long.’

Adam looked at me with great seriousness. He took my hand and walked me to the porch, opened the front door and gestured to the gilded green garden beyond.

‘Darling, this is Cornwall. It’s still here, still sunlit, still beautiful, still ours. It’s not the same, it won’t ever be; our love for it will be forever tinged with sorrow. But, Molly, tragedy happens anywhere. Everywhere. This place will always be Joey’s. And yours, and mine, and Danny’s. And now Edie’s and Lola’s.’

He kissed me. I let myself lean into him. He smelled gorgeous, looked ridiculously handsome in his dark grey suit. I felt happy.

‘I do feel different here, and I’m glad you made me come. But something’s happening. It’s not over yet.’

Adam smiled and led me to the car. ‘I know that, sweetheart. But as far as I’m concerned, it’s going in the right direction.’

We drove to Talland Bay through a golden evening. The sea, when we glimpsed it, held a promise of Avalon, King Arthur’s magic kingdom, glittering and