CAIRO! THOUGH YOU PROBABLY ALREADY KNEW THAT BECAUSE MY NUMBER AND MY SILLY FACE APPEARED ON YOUR PHONE WITH THIS MESSAGE. ^.^
Tarrah shook her head. Her mother and her emoticons. Tarrah should have never told her about that “smiley” application.
ANYWHO, HAPPY CHRISTMAS EVE AND MERRY CHRISTMAS EARLY FOR YOU! I CAN’T REMEMBER EXACTLY WHAT TIME IT IS THERE, BUT I’M SURE IT HASN’T HAPPENED FOR YOU YET. :D
Tarrah smirked. God Mom lay off the “smileys.”
SORRY WE COULDN’T SEE YOU FOR CHRISTMAS AGAIN THIS YEAR, BUT YOU SHOULD BE GETTING THE GIFTS WE SENT TO YOU ANY DAY NOW!
Tarrah had and saying she loved her new iPad was an understatement. She had squealed like a little girl for almost five minutes straight.
UM, SO OKAY, THE REAL REASON I’M SENDING YOU THIS MESSAGE…
Tarrah’s heart leaped.
WE’RE NOT COMING TO VISIT YOU FOR NEW YEAR’S, WE—
The phone slipped from Tarrah’s hand before she could read the rest of the message. Without another thought, she got her clothes on, then left the hotel room in a daze. She couldn’t be there any longer. And she made her way home, she couldn’t help but wonder: what was I thinking?
Chapter Sixteen
The time was 11:35 p.m., and Tarrah now shook with anxiety under the sheets of her dorm bed. She felt so stupid. How could she have even thought to commit to Chase? She couldn’t be with him. He lived across the freakin’ country. He would leave her and she would be alone. She felt like such an idiot for growing attached to him, because now she hurt. Her heart hurt so badly she could scream. This wasn’t how Christmas Eve was supposed to turn out. She was supposed to have her fling. She was supposed to be happy. No attachment, no emotions. It was just supposed to be raw feelings, physical and nothing more. Physical felt good and physical didn’t hurt when it was gone, but emotions did. If there were emotions, feelings always got hurt, every time.
Her tears soaked her pillow as her clock radio switched to Nat King Cole’s “The Christmas Song.”
Douche.
If she didn’t already feel bad before, the damn DJ managed to do it.
She didn’t mean to hurt Chase and the minute he woke up, she knew he’d be hurt. She hated that she did this to him, but she was such a coward. She couldn’t mend this. She just wanted it over and done with. Why hadn’t she just slept with Swanson? If she had, Chase would have wanted nothing to do with her and whatever they had would have been over. Now she was hurt and Chase would soon feel the same when he realized she was gone. She was such an idiot.
She sniffed and slid her hand into the pocket of the red dress she hadn’t even bothered taking off before hopping in bed. It was still there…his card.
Chase Stewart , it read.
She wondered if she would have looked at the card earlier and seen Chase’s last name, would she have realized he was a part of the Stewart family. Of course she would have. He looked just like them, and if she had realized the family resemblance, she wouldn’t have gone to the Stewart’s holiday weekend, thereby avoiding this whole mess she’d gotten herself into with Chase. She wished she would have read the card.
She scanned down the card and read his email. Pushing herself up, she rubbed her eyes. She at least owed him that.
She grabbed her laptop from under her bed and booted it up. After quickly pulling up her student email account, she typed:
I’m so sorry, Chase. – Tarrah
She hit send. She was such a coward. She was such a horrible person, but she was willing to be selfish to make the pain stop. Her eyes flickered when she received a new message.
She gasped. It was from Chase.
You didn’t think it would be that easy, did you? – Chase
Knock, knock, knock.
Tarrah glanced up. Someone was at the door. Her eyes shifted to her computer screen after she got another message from Chase.
I’m not going to let you go that easy, Tarrah. Please let me in. – Chase
He was at her