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that meant she had to move away. Carolyn’s nightmares returned. Only this time, Dock didn’t take her away. He took Suzie.
    “Carolyn.” She came abruptly awake and found her mother sitting on the edge of the bed. She brushed the hair back from Carolyn’s forehead. “You’re having nightmares again?” When Carolyn started to cry, her mother patted her leg. Carolyn thought of Dock and moved away. Mom frowned and folded her hands in her lap. “I don’t know what started them, but you’re safe. Everything is fine. Mommy and Daddy are close by.”
    “Suzie’s gone.”
    “You’ll make another friend. You’ll see. It won’t be as hard next time.”
    Carolyn thought it better not to try. First Oma had gone away. Then Dock. And now Suzie was gone, too.
* * *
    1954
    “I’m doing my best, Hildie.” Carolyn’s father sounded angry and tired.
    “I’m not saying you aren’t. Just let me go back to work for a little while so we can save money for the master bedroom.”
    “What about the kids?”
    “It’s partly because of the kids! They can’t sleep in the same room forever, Trip. Besides that, Carolyn was invited to a birthday party last week, and I couldn’t let her go because we couldn’t afford to buy a present. Her first birthday party invitation and I had to say no.”
    “It won’t kill her.”
    “Trip . . .”
    “You can’t just leave them on their own to fend for themselves.”
    “I can work night shifts. I’d be home by seven in the morning. They wouldn’t even know I was gone.”
    “Remember what happened the last time you took on too much work and didn’t get enough rest.”
    “Yes, Trip.” Mommy’s voice sharpened. “We still have the hospital bill. It reminds me— every single month .”
    They lowered their voices, and Carolyn fell asleep again. They argued every night about the same thing until Daddy gave in.
* * *
    1955
    Mom’s hours changed to “swing shift,” and a key was placed under the flowerpot by the front door. “Be sure to put the key back after you unlock the door. Otherwise, it won’t be there tomorrow and you’ll have to sit outside until Daddy gets home from work. Charlie, if you go anywhere, you be sure to leave a note as to where you’re going. Be home by five at the latest. Carolyn, you stay in the house. Play with your doll or read books, but don’t go wandering off.”
    Dad bought a television set. Mom complained about the money. Dad said everyone else in the neighborhood had a television; why shouldn’t they?
    Carolyn turned it on every day when she came home from school. She felt better hearing voices in the house. She didn’t feel as lonely.
    “I think it’s time you quit working, Hildie. Carolyn needs you.”
    “She’s doing better.”
    “Better how? Watching TV? Never getting to play outside the house except on weekends? A little girl shouldn’t be alone so much. Things could happen.”
    What things? Carolyn was afraid to ask.
    “School lets out in two weeks, Hildemara. What’re you going to do then? leave the kids alone all day every day?”
    “I put in for night shift.”
    “And you think that’s going to solve our problems?”
    “I don’t know, Trip. What will?”
    He muttered something and Mom got mad. “I’m trying to help you, and you can’t even say a civil word to me! What happened to the man I fell in love with, the one who wanted us to be a team and build something together ? What happened to him ?”
    “The war happened!” Daddy didn’t sound mad this time. He said more, but Carolyn couldn’t hear. “I’ve been thinking there might be another way to work this out.”
    “What way?”
    “Take them down to Murietta. . . .”
    Carolyn sighed. She fell asleep in her own bed for the first time in months.

5
    The day after school let out, Dad put two suitcases in the trunk of the car and drove Carolyn and Charlie down to Oma’s farm outside Murietta. Mom cried the night before they left.
    Oma had a casserole