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in my life these last few weeks. It felt like it should have stopped, or at least changed in some way.
    But, just because my world was coming apart at the edges, didn’t mean everyone else’s was.
    I heard the door close and felt Hayden’s footsteps as he came to me. I thought he would rest his hands on my shoulders; I even tensed a little there, preparing for the weight of his touch. I thought he’d want to talk—to explain why what had just happened hadn’t really been what I thought it was. I thought he would be filled with regret. Disgust even. He had been caught up in the moment, but this interruption had allowed him to come to his senses.
    But that’s not what happened.
    Without warning, he swept me up in his arms and carried me to the bed. He lay me gently, his mouth pressed to my throat as he balanced himself over me on his hands and knees. I didn’t know what to do, didn’t know how to respond. But my fingers somehow found themselves in his hair, tugging him closer to me. And then his mouth was on mine again and I was gone. There was so little thought, just need. Just want. Just this ache that had always been there inside of me, this ache that I’d assumed would never be satisfied.
    This was my chance to experience things I’d heard about, listened to Megan whisper about, something I’d read about and dreamt about…but observers are very rarely participants.
    He stretched out beside me, his hands so gentle as they touched me through the thick material of the robe. His lips slid over my chin, moving up along my jaw. Then he was kissing my throat, nibbling at my neck here and there as his fingers gently began to part the top of the robe. I closed my eyes, trying not to panic, trying not to realize that I was about to be naked in front of a man for the first time in my life.
    His hand was warm, the skin surprisingly soft, as he brushed his fingers over my nipples, as he gripped one breast and squeezed it ever so gently. Every nerve in my body seemed to come alive with his touch and scream out for more. When his hot breath touched my breast, I thought I might jump out of my skin. And then he was drawing my nipple into his mouth, and that was even more intense, even better that just his touch.
    I ran my fingers through his hair, needing to touch him, needing to know that this was real and not just some powerful dream—another fantasy. But he was so real, and he looked up at me, his eyes dark with need. No one had ever looked at me like that before.
    I wanted this… God, I wanted this!
    And, right now, I didn’t care why it was happening. I just…I wanted it.
    He spread the robe open as he slowly moved down the length of my body. He dragged his lips over my belly, pressing the tip of his tongue into my navel. And then he was peppering my hips with little kisses, nibbling here and there as he moved down to my thigh. He was careful to move the material of the robe in such a way that he only uncovered little bits of me here and there, clearly aware that I wasn’t quite ready to be completely exposed.
    When he knelt beside me and began to unbutton his shirt, I was torn between being an observer and being a participant. I wanted to touch him—I wanted it so much that my fingers actually itched with anticipation—but I wanted to see him, too. He watched me, his eyes moving slowly over my face. There was something about the way he looked at me, the way his eyes stayed on my face and didn’t move down along the exposed places of my body that gave me courage. I pulled myself up to my knees and ran my hands slowly over his broad chest where he was slowly exposing himself with each button he released.
    He was unmarked by tattoos. I knew most of the guys who worked at Dragon had tattoos—Megan once described Dante’s tattoos to me in detail—so I’d expected a few on Hayden. But when he slipped the shirt from his arms, there was nothing but the perfection of his deeply tanned skin.
    We sat there for a few