Read HAPPY PANTS CAFE (THE HAPPY PANTS SERIES) for Free Online Page A

carrying two oversized wineglasses, presenting a bottle. Austin nodded and then turned his gaze back to Harper. “I don’t know. But whatever it is, it has to be one of those female rituals invented by women desperate to get married.”
    The waitress poured a glass for Harper to taste and asked, “Are you two talking about that place?” Her gaze flashed over to the floral arches across the street.
    “Yes. What do you know about it?” Harper absentmindedly lifted the glass, forgetting to actually try the wine, and nodded.
    “Well,” the waitress poured Austin’s glass, “it’s supposedly bad luck to talk about it, but I have two best friends and a sister who swear by the place.”
    Both Harper and Austin fell silent and scooted closer like children who were about to be told a really, really good story.
    The waitress filled Harper’s gargantuan wineglass the rest of the way. “I don’t know how it started, but that café has been around for a very, very long time. And people say that when you eat one of their cookies, you are guaranteed to meet your one true love within seven days.”
    Harper chuckled. So that was what this was all about? Seriously? Like a Prince Charming lucky charm?
    The waitress leaned in to whisper, “They say that a certain royal couple over in the U.K. owe their wedded bliss to this place. Along with a long list of movie stars.” The waitress mouthed the words, “Brad and Angelina.”
    Harper couldn’t believe that people were buying this crap. “What’s in the cookies?”
    The waitress shrugged. “I don’t know, but half this town will tell you that they know at least three or four happily married couples who met within the seven-day window. That is, if you can get anyone to talk about it.”
    Austin smiled and sipped his wine. “Thank you…uh?”
    The waitress made goo-goo eyes at him. “Charlaine. I’m Charlaine Hendricks. I live down the street in the little purple house.” She winked. “Alone.”
    That was a blatant invite, and Harper wanted to claw her eyes out.
    Whoa, Nelly. What’s up with that? This man is so, so not yours. And he’s so, so not trustworthy.
    Right you are.
    Harper took a real sip of her delicious, smoky red wine with sweet undertones of ripe currants. Yummm…just died, went to heaven.
    “You okay?” Austin asked, one rich, silky brown brow lifted.
    I just had a wine-gasm . Got the panties to prove it!
    Harp! Did you really just think that? What’s the matter with you?
    “Fine. Yep. Just…fine.” And now that we know there is a story here, it’s time to drink your ass under the table. You’re in my territory now, Super Ken. Get ready to muuuuumble!
    Harper chugged down her glass. “That wine is so good.”
    Austin looked at her empty glass, threw back his, and then poured a second round. “I know my wines. Just like I know how to get a story.”
    Yeah. We’ll see about that.
     
    ~~
     
    Three Bottles Later…
     
    “You’re right,” Austin slurred just a little, full glass in hand, empty plate pushed to one side. “The news isn’t news anymore.” He flung his drunken wrist into the air. “It’s just doom and gloom.”
    Harper swayed in her chair and then placed her elbows on the table, cupping her wine. “That’s…right! That’s why I write for the society column, dammit. Everyone is happy! Happy. Happy parties, happy weddings, happy! Hey, speaking of happy, what do you think they put in those cookies?”
    Damn, I am so drunk. Please, dear gods of drunkenness, let me hold my liquor tonight. I promise to kill a tiny creature in your honor if I don’t throw up.
    Austin shrugged his broad, square shoulders. “Nothing. People believe what they want.”
    “Hi. We’re getting ready to close, so can I get you anything else?” The grinning waitress looked like she was ready for bed. With Austin. And Harper’s competitive side, lubricated by way, way too much wine, kicked in.
    “Nope!” Harper spouted. “We’re all ready for