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the heat of the two of them naked and melding together, nor do I want to.
    Speaking of Kai, his death-defying fire-throwing act is the finale of the show. He is scantily clad in a loincloth. His dark skin glistens and his muscles flex as he does seemingly impossible stunts with flames. I am nervous, intrigued, and incredibly turned on all at once. I don’t want to see him get burned or hurt in any way, and it seems impossible that he won’t, but I can’t tear my eyes away from the incomparable beauty of his performance.
    When he finishes unscathed, the crowd goes wild. I clap so hard my hands hurt. He bows and brings the others out for a final bow. I feel like he is looking right at me, but I know the stage spotlights make this impossible.
    When the noise dies down, Baggy leans over the table to say, “I don’t care what he’s up to. He’s so handsome and talented, I wouldn’t kick him out of bed for eating cookies, if you know what I mean.” At this, she waggles her eyebrows suggestively. I’m not sure exactly what she means, but I do know that I don’t want to hear any more, so I simply nod.
    Just then, an older gentleman plops down at the unused fourth chair at our table. He smiles at Baggy with a lemon wedge in his mouth, similar to what she had done to us with her pineapple. The gesture makes Baggy bubble with laughter. He kisses her hand before introducing himself as Jim Bond. Is that short for James Bond? I wonder, shaking my head at his ridiculousness.
    Mr. Bond tells Baggy that he has been keeping an eye on her since we arrived. “It seems you’re quite the spy.” He leers at her. “I hope you’re not after me, or you just might catch me.” Just as I’m about ready to tell this smooth operator to get lost, Baggy titters. Is that even a word? It seems like the only appropriate word for her reaction.
    Before I can intervene, Mr. Bond asks Baggy for a dance, and they begin a dramatic tango on the empty dance floor. I look to Ruthie for help, but her attention has been caught by the lifeguard/scuba instructor/general watersports dude who is surrounded by a bevy of females at the bar. Sensing a challenge, she instructs me “not to wait up” before sauntering off in his direction.
    I turn my attention back to Baggy just in time to see Mr. Bond produce a red rose for her, seemingly out of thin air. Baggy giggles as he places it behind her ear. Wow, this guy is slick.
    “Guess I’ll take a walk along the beach.” I say the words aloud, even though no one is around to hear them.
    As I take the path toward the water, I see Kai and Leilani. They are clearly having a heated discussion. I really don’t want to spy on them, but something makes me hunker down behind a bush within earshot. This is so unlike me , I think as I’m squatting near the ground. All of Baggy’s crazy antics must be rubbing off on me .
    Then I hear something that makes me cringe. Leilani’s voice is shaky as she says, “This baby is the most important thing in the world to me, Kai.” With more conviction she adds, “I’m not giving it up.”
    I am well aware that none of this is any of my business, but I still somehow feel betrayed. I wish he would step up and accept responsibility for his actions. I put my head farther down as Leilani bursts into tears and runs back toward the resort. Kai turns and heads toward the beach, not bothering to chase after her.
    Once they are each out of sight and I don’t have to worry about being caught eavesdropping, I stand up. Rather than continuing on my planned walk, which would run me the risk of bumping into Kai, I decide just to go back to our villa. I’m feeling a little depressed. After all, if someone as gorgeous as Leilani has man troubles, how much hope is there for the rest of us?
    When I get back to the room, I take a nice hot bath in the giant spa tub to relax and try to wash off the minor blues I am experiencing. It doesn’t really work, so I go to bed. I don’t even wake when