sensitivity to light & so many allergies. / I hope youâll grow up to be so much stronger.
There is so much water in this world, / as in you. / We barely have the clinic running. / We have to start producing antibiotics.
Oh the world I would make for you. / It still wouldnât be good enough.
Bad things will happen to you. / Just know they happened to me too;Â / and Iâm still here.
A few days before this / I argued w/yr Father about leaving (again). / Love someone for who they are. / That was part of who he was, is. / To deny that part of him would have been cruel. / And yes, I miss My Beautiful Idiot.
Make sure you sleep. / If you go w/o long enough youâll hallucinate. / Paranoia. / Anxiety. / Mood swings. / Inability to function.
Tamara, if you ever find your Dad. / Tell him I loved him best.
No, My Husband / here with our girl. / To think I used to have breakfast in bed / every day. / Before this we were picking out faucets. âIâm only going for a week.â / Now: all the faucets I want. / Home: / where you arenât scared.
In my 20s, on a train. / This city glimmering before me, / & for me. / âThis is for you.â / Letâs play. / We laughed, that game with the button.
When? / Before you were born. / Stilettos? / Uncomfortable shoes / to be attractive. / Showed you never had to walk. / Not so useful now. / We left because / your Father and I followed our brains. / Good thing. / That city was one of the first. / I saw it destroyed on tv . / tv ? / I told you what that was / remember that flip-book we made? / & I watched / & it wasnât pretend. / In a few hours there wasnât tv , radio.
There were clouds, rain. / We had agreed the kitchen & bathroom faucets should be equal quality. / Right before we moved.
Tamara, some of these notes are for your Father. / I hope that Beautiful Idiot gets to read them / with you. / He missed you so much.
T., I donât know if I should show you how to make or break (weâre low on jokes) chairs. / Watermelon. / So many places I wanted to see.
Your Dad made these amazing toys / Like dominoes.
Your Mum read Emily Post as a child. / What I wouldnât do. / I hope you like the boat.
I always loved you for your lack of heroics. / But today, someone called you âDadâ and that was polite at best. / Just say her real Dad is off literally saving the world. / Please. / Tamara has to start somewhere. / That seems good place.
This govât acknowledges all religions & faiths. / Unless they can reverse this, feed & clothe everyone / we need a secular plan. / Please help.
T., Iâm going to give you the worst basics. / Please do not cloud-seed, develop directional emp s, bio-weapons, / fall in love. / I trust your judgment. / Okay, fall in love. / Someone to share your photographs with. / Who makes jam / and does a mean appendectomy.
T., I did the best I could. / Donât you think I want to wake up? / Promise you something?
You made me smile: thank-you. / Get out. / I love my husband so much more than this will ever be. / And yes, I pretend to laugh at your jokes.
I didnât have you in my will / it took some time to warm up to you.
You know, when I was first pregnant / your Dad thought you beautiful. / Even then.
No, love isnât a temporary condition. / Donât use that word otherwise.
We took you in with a skill set. / We are so very happy to have you here. / No, we donât like to talk about the past.
On your paternal side, your family came from Europe to America on the Mayflower and the Lyon . / Your v. great grandaunt was a Salem witch. / She escaped. / Donât test that theory.
Your grandfather taught me relativity on a mountain. / He told me we are not just pencils â carbon â but diamonds. / I want to tell you because you are so shiny & precious / but Iâd rather you believe in science. / You shiny, perfect carbon.
I donât pretend that your
Barbara Boswell, Copyright Paperback Collection (Library of Congress) DLC