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nothing but a low-down molasses-slurper and a mutton thief, but do you know what he did? He was stealing chickens—methodically, not like the old days when they’d steal one or two and try to duck the BBs. He had taken so many over a period of time that he was over in the other county, big as you please, dressed up like a gentleman, smoking a seegar and driving a carriage which featured factory climate-control air conditioning, vinyl top, AM/FM stereo radio, full leather interior, power-lock doors, six-way power seat, power windows, white-wall wheels, door-edge guards, bumper impact strips, rear defroster and soft-ray glass.
    “It was full of beautiful women fanning themselves and filling the rose-tinted air with their gay laughter. He had set up his own poultry business, was underselling everybody in eggs, gizzards, gristles, livers—and had a reputation far and wide for his succulent drumsticks. Had a white slave fronting for him for ten percent. Well, when my man finally discovered him after finding he’d built a dummy to look like him so we’d think he was still in the fields, do you know what he did, Mr. Lincoln? He stabbed the man. Stabbed him and fled on a white horse, his cape furling in the wind. It was very dramatic.
    “You defend Negro ruffians like that, Mr. Lincoln? You yourself, Mr. President, said that you were never in favor of bringing about social and political equality with them. You don’t want them to vote, either. I mean, I read that in the newspaper. They’re not like us, Mr. Lincoln. You said yourself that there are physical differences. Now you know you said it, Mr. Lincoln. When General Fremont got brash and freed the slaves in the Western territory, you overruled his proclamation, and now the military man tells me that you have some sort of wild proclamation on your desk you’re about to sign, if this compensatory thing doesn’t work.”
    “I haven’t made up my mind yet, Mr. Swille. I guess I’m a little wishy-washy on the subject still. But … well, sometimes I just think that one man enslaving another man is wrong. Is wrong. Is very wrong.” Lincoln pounds the table.
    “Well, I won’t try to influence your decision, Mr. President. Would you like Uncle Robin to help you with one of those sacks?”
    “Thank you, Mr. Swille.”
    Uncle Robin goes over and helps Lincoln with two of the heavy gold bags.
    “And before you leave, Mr. President, go down to the kitchen and have Barracuda the Mammy fix you a nice snack. She’ll be so thrilled. All she talks about is Massa Lincoln, Massa Lincoln. Maybe you can sign a few autographs.”
    Swille rises and walks over to Lincoln, who is now standing, his hands heavy with sacks of gold. “And think before you sign that proclamation, Mr. President. The slaves like it here. Look at this childish race. Uncle Robin, don’t you like it here?”
    “Why, yessuh, Mr. Swille! I loves it here. Good something to eat when you wonts it. Color TV. Milk pail fulla toddy. Some whiskey and a little nookie from time to time. We gets whipped with a velvet whip, and there’s free dental care and always a fiddler case your feets get restless.”
    “You see, Mr. President. They need someone to guide them through this world of woe or they’ll hurt themselves.”
    “I’ll certainly consider your views when I make my decision, Mr. Swille. Well, I have to go now. And thanks for contributing to the war chest, Mr. Swille.”
    “Sure, Lincoln, anything you say.” Swille goes to the window. “Hey, I think the escort Lee sent up has arrived. Look, Lincoln, I’m throwing a little shindig for Mr. and Mrs. Jefferson Davis. Why don’t you come down? I’d like to get you two together for one day. Take time off from the war.”
    “You can arrange that, Mr. Swille?”
    “I can arrange anything. They called my father God’s God, Mr. President. Davis may hate your flag and you, but everybody salutes our flag. Gold, energy and power: that’s our flag. Now, you have