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simple. When I knew exactly what to expect from my days and
where my life was going. This crazy limbo I’m hanging precariously
in is almost too much to deal with.
    I could end it all now.
I could give in and give Aaron what he wants. Me.
    I just don’t know if I
can. I love him, but I don’t know if I respect him anymore, and I
sure as hell don’t trust him. How can I? How do you trust someone
who kept something so critical to their life from you?
    That doesn’t stop my
heart or my body crying out for him though. It doesn’t stop the
heavy thumps in my chest when he’s around. I still want to sink
into his arms and never leave the comfort of them.
    I almost want him to
convince me he’s worth it all. He took so much from me so readily,
but he never really gave me any of himself in return. He so easily
told me to give everything up for him when he couldn’t even give up
a skeleton rotting in his closet. And now… Now he’s fighting.
    Now that he’s sorted
his shit, he’s back and he’s fighting. I wonder if he knows what
he’s fighting for. I wonder if I know what he’s fighting
for.
    I don’t. I don’t have a
clue what he’s doing.
    All he says is that I
belong to him. I do. I’m not naïve enough to believe I don’t… But
it’s not enough. Maybe if he said them, the words I want to hear,
it might change things.
    Telling me that he
never stopped loving me isn’t enough. If he stands in front of me,
looks me in the eye, and tells me that he loves me, then it could
change everything. I’d know what he’s fighting for, I’d know why
he’s fighting, and perhaps I’d be willing to fight for the same
thing.
    Perhaps.
     

Chapter
Five
     
    “Um, hi?”
    I stop my absent
dipping of my finger in the sugar pot and look at Liv. “Hi.”
    “Not that I don’t love
you being here, but why the fuck are you here?” She drops
her bags and kicks the door shut.
    “I’m hiding.”
    “Right.”
    “Angus has been keeping
me company. He’s not one for conversation, is he?” I cast a glance
at the cat. He hops off the stool, his tail in the air, and stalks
off. “Kind of moody, too.”
    “He’s a cat,” she
replies flatly. “Why are you hiding?”
    “Don’t ask.” I lick my
finger free of sugar.
    “I wish you wouldn’t do
that.” Liv wrinkles her face. “It’s disgusting. I’m going to have
to replace my sugar now.”
    I shrug and dip my
finger back in. “I’ll carry on then.”
    “It’s Aaron, isn’t
it?”
    I roll my eyes. “It’s
always Aaron. He’s a pain in my fucking ass. A relentless pain—like
that annoying muscle ache you get after working out too hard.”
    “Why don’t you just
tell him to fuck off?”
    “I did.”
    “And?”
    “He told me I belonged
to him. Do I look like I have a collar with a nametag on to
you?”
    Liv’s eyebrows arch.
“Okay, Dayton. I think you’ve had enough sugar.” She takes the pot
from me, slams the lid on, and puts it on top of a cupboard I can’t
reach. “And enough alone time with my cat. How long have you been
here?”
    “Two days. I told the
guy who lives opposite you that he didn’t have to feed Angus. He
seemed kinda happy about it.” I would be, too, if I’m honest. This
cat is a menace. “Anyway, I thought you were coming back
yesterday?”
    “I was, but I decided
to stop by and see my parents. I wasn’t expecting your mopey ass to
be here, was I?”
    I shrug. “Whatever. I
thought Monique might have called me with a job, but she
hasn’t.”
    Three days with nothing
is unusual—even without the sex side of the job. In a city like
Seattle, there’s always someone who needs a lunch or dinner date or
even someone to accompany them to an art gallery opening or some
shit.
    Three days of complete
silence is unheard of.
    “Really? Nothing?”
    I shake my head and
take the cup of coffee she offers. “I’ve checked my cell about a
thousand times. No calls or messages. I don’t know what’s going
on.”
    “Have you tried