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blow. I feel like a part of my body is missing. It’s like waking one day and only having one arm, or leg. I reach for her instinctually through my side of the bond, my soul reaching out for its keeper, only to run into a black wall of nothingness, an impenetrable force field, separating me from Arsema. As soon as she went into the coma, I lost her. Finding the Shaman is the only lead we have on bringing her back and I am determined to locate him or her. I just pray Elmeri is right and the shaman magic will be able to awaken her. 
     
                  I didn't tell Tris, but she was partly right. I am not sure how I will survive out here much longer.  I feel myself growing weaker and weaker every day. It has less to do with food and sleep than she thinks. No, this is something more. The longer I'm away from Arsema, the weaker I become. My soul feels like it is slowly rotting away inside of me. I feel it disintegrating. I ache all over. From head to toe and no amount of pain medicine will help relieve the pain. My limbs are heavy and it takes everything I have inside of me to pick my legs up and move forward another step. The farther I move away from Arsema the worse it becomes. I should turn around, but I can't give up yet. I am her only help. I can survive anything for her. She is my soulkeeper.
     
    I know from the stories I have heard growing up, that soul keepers were not meant to be separated. And to do so would lead to horrible consequences, but I also know that I'm the one with the best chance of finding the one person, who can save Arsema. Elmeri remembers reading somewhere that shamans hold special magic within themselves, connecting them to the Earth itself. It’s a long shot, but it is the only thing we have to try at the moment and unless someone comes up with a better idea, I will continue to search and pray.
     
    Leaving her side was a chance I had to take. I wouldn't ever have considered taking a gamble with my soul keeper’s life, but desperate times call for desperate measures and in this case if I didn't leave, I feared I could lose her forever.
     
    The pain I feel is a constant reminder to what I have left behind. It tempts me daily to turn around, go back. I fight it the only way I know how, by taking one step at a time. I just pray that I will find the shaman soon so that we can all return home where we belong.
     
    It’s only been a day since I left Tris and Orin and I already miss their company. I even find myself missing Tris’ non stop banter and smart mouth. I can see how she would be good for Arsema. Tris is so carefree and honest with her opinion. She doesn't sugar coat anything. If you anger her in any way, then you know about it. And boy can that girl hold a grudge. I know I will be paying for the stunt I pulled leaving her alone with Orin for a long while to come. I laugh out loud thinking of the many ways she will probably torture me in the future.
     
    I think back to the onetime Tris held a grudge against Orin for weeks. Tris had been saying for over a week how she wanted a bunny. When I say she had been saying it, I mean she found a way to fit it in every conversation we had all day, every day. Nonstop. Every Time she saw something scurry through the woods she would jump up and proclaim “Oh! Wouldn't it just be great to have a fat little rabbit? I’d love one for myself!!!”
     
    Ok so if you have never spent any time with Tris when she wants something then you probably don't understand, but let me just say that by the end of the week I was ready to go get the girl a bunny myself. Thankfully I didn't.
     
    Orin left one day just before dawn. I thought he had finally tossed in his cards and gave up altogether, but he returned a few hours later, with a fat little rabbit on the line. He had spent 2 hours tracking and hunting it just for her, so he could make her happy. Did it make her happy? Oh no!!! Tris ran out of her makeshift tent when Orin yelled that he found her a