Read Down River for Free Online Page B

ground—it is what they are made to do—and looking over the one that defined our border I thought that maybe the talent had rubbed off on my brother. He talked about money he’d spent and about the girls he’d laid. He counted them up for me, a slew of them. Our conversation did not venture beyond that until he asked about the reason for my return. The question came at the end of his second beer, and he slipped it in like it meant nothing. But his eyes couldn’t lie. It was all he cared about.
    Was I back for good?
    I told him the truth as I knew it: doubtful.
    To his credit, he covered his relief well. “Are you sticking around for dinner?” he asked, draining the beer.
    “Do you think that I should?”
    He scratched at his thinning hair. “It might be easier with just Dad here. I think he’ll forgive you for what happened, but Mom won’t be happy. There’s no lie in that.”
    “I’m not here to ask for forgiveness.”
    “Damn, Adam, let’s not start this up again. Dad had to choose a side. He could believe you or he could believe Mom, but he couldn’t believe both of you.”
    “This is still my family, Jamie, even after all that’s happened. She can’t very well tell me to stay away.”
    Jamie’s eyes grew suddenly sympathetic. “She’s scared of you, Adam.”
    “This is my home.” The words sounded hollow. “I was acquitted.”
    Jamie rolled massive shoulders. “Your call, bro. It’ll be interesting either way. I’m just glad to have a front-row seat.”
    His smile was patently false; but he was trying. “You’re such an ass, Jamie.”
    “Don’t hate me ’cause I’m beautiful.”
    “Tomorrow night, then. May as well do it all at once.” But that was only part of it. I was feeling the pain, a profound ache that still had room to grow. I thought of Robin’s dark bedroom, and then of my father and the note he had been unable to complete. The time would be good for everyone.
    “So, how’s Dad?’ I asked.
    “Ah, he’s bulletproof. You know how he is.”
    “Not anymore,” I said, but Jamie ignored me. “I’m going to walk down to the river, then I’ll be out of here. Tell Dad that I’m sorry I missed him.”
    “Say hello to Grace,” he said.
    “She’s down there?”
    “Every day. Same time.”
    I’d thought a lot about Grace, but was less sure of how to approach her than anyone else. She was two years old when she came to live with Dolf, still a child when I’d left, too young for any kind of explanation. For thirteen years I’d been a large part of her world, and leaving her alone is what felt most like a betrayal. All of my letters had come back unopened. Eventually, I’d stopped sending them.
    “How is she?” I asked, trying not to show how much the answer mattered.
    Jamie shook his head. “She’s a wild Indian, no mistake, but she always has been. She’s not going to college, looks like. She’s working odd jobs, hanging around the farm, living off the fat of the land.”
    “Is she happy?”
    “She should be. She’s the hottest thing in three counties.”
    “Is that right?” I asked.
    “Hell, I’d fuck her.” He winked at me, not seeing how close he was to a beating. I told myself that he meant nothing by it. He was just being a smart-ass. He’d forgotten how much I loved Grace. How protective of her I’d always been.
    He wasn’t trying to start something.
    “Good to see you, Jamie.” I dropped a hand on the hard lump of his shoulder. “I’ve missed you.”
    He folded his massive frame into the pickup truck. “Tomorrow night,” he said, and jolted off toward the fields. From the porch I saw his arm appear as he draped it through the window. Then he tossed a wave, and I knew that he was watching me in the rearview mirror. I stepped onto the lawn and watched until he was gone. Then I turned down the hill.
    Grace and I had been close. Maybe it was that day on the riverbank, when I’d held her, wailing, as my father hammered Dolf into the dirt for