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lower her voice, Ivan if he could hear would make no response — if he did it would be a step towards recovery, but even so she spoke in a whisper. ‘He saw Gogol rise and head for the port and you trying to stop him. There was a struggle and you were thrown to one side. Ivan turned back towards the door but, naturally, Frank had the Pinnace on remote control and he couldn’t open it. He tried, God how he tried, then, suddenly, he collapsed.’
    ‘And Frank brought us back to the ship?’
    ‘Yes. You seemed to be unconscious and when you arrived back here —’
    ‘Seemed? I was out, surely.’
    ‘No, Douglas.’ Claire met his eyes, her own direct. ‘You weren’t unconscious, not in the way you mean. You were disoriented and on the edge of catatonia, but you weren’t asleep or stunned.’
    He said, attempting to be casual, ‘There’s a difference?’
    ‘Medically, yes, but we won’t go into that now. It isn’t important. I drugged you, gave you hypnotic therapy and some electro-stimulated sleep. Now it’s your turn to help me. What happened out there?’
    ‘You know what happened. Ivan went crazy and tried to step out into space. I tried to stop him and got hurt. I guess I was concussed — would that account for it? My condition, I mean?’
    He was anxious and Claire could guess why. A pilot had to be fit otherwise he was useless. A man given to psychic breakdown had no place in a Pinnace.
    ‘Officially, yes.’ Her smile eased his trepidation. ‘But there was more to it than that. Did you sense that the Pinnace was out of control? Veering? Twisting, perhaps?’
    ‘Yes.’
    It had maintained an even course at all times — his own sensory apparatus had been at fault, not the guidance systems of the machine.
    ‘Anything else? Dreams, perhaps? Odd visual effects? Sounds?’
    ‘There was confusion and then darkness. Nothing else.’
    ‘Are you certain?’
    He said, stiffly, ‘You’ve known me long enough and well enough to know that I’m not a liar.’
    ‘Douglas, I didn’t call you that! But I need to know. It’s important. Can you remember anything at all after Gogol hit you? I’m not asking you to be factual — we know what happened within the Pinnace, but only you can tell us what happened in your mind. You mentioned confusion. Was it visual? Did you hear snatches of song, for example? A voice? Did you experience a sudden, overwhelming desire of some kind? An urge to do something?’
    He said, dryly, ‘Like opening the port? No. I had no intention of committing suicide.’
    ‘What then?’
    For a moment he remained silent and she gained the impression of a man struggling with himself, of overcoming doubts and fears, of surrendering some private citadel.
    ‘Ivan hit me and I fell,’ he said, abruptly. ‘I was dazed and almost out. The Pinnace seemed to be spinning and twisting — you said it wasn’t but that’s how it felt to me. It grew dark but there were lights and, yes, a voice of some kind. It was like when you are half asleep and barely hear what’s going on close at hand. The lights were flashes, dots in the shadows like stars and something moved against them. I was afraid, I think. No, I was afraid and yet at the same time resigned. There was nothing I could do. Then the darkness came and it was like falling into an ebon cloud.’ He added, thoughtfully, ‘A fall which never seemed to end.’
    ‘The voice — what did it say?’
    ‘I don’t know.’ He shrugged at her expression. ‘I’m not playing games, Doctor, I simply don’t know. The words were blurred and almost as if they were foreign. I say “almost” because there was a familiarity about them, but I couldn’t make them out.’
    ‘The tone? One of rejection?’
    ‘More of negation.’ Carter frowned as he thought about it. ‘Someone or something saying a certain thing was not to be. Am I making sense?’
    Before answering Claire crossed to her desk and activated an instrument. West heard a blur of words,