Read Denying Heaven (Room 103) for Free Online Page B

drained it
from her and fed my essence with it, my desperation in obtaining it from her
saw my fingers digging deep into her flesh. She cringed but gave me everything
she had, “Take it, I’m here Spirit, take it all, sweetie.”
    I choked on the sob that was stabbing my chest as the
pain in my gut broke through in strangled dry heaves, “Ssshhh, sweetie,
ssshhh.”
    “I can’t… I can’t… breathe…”
    Janey palmed my cheeks and turned my blue face to hers,
her anguish and fear tightening my lungs even more as I gasped at nothing. My
vision was blurring as my lungs screeched in shock, my brain was going into
panic as my throat constricted further.
    “SPIRIT!!!” Was the last thing I heard as my mind finally
shut down to the pain and gave me the peace and calm that my soul craved.

Chapter 5
bulk
     
    “What the fuck?” Romeo barked at me as I kicked the door
shut behind me and raided the mini bar. “What’s got your back up?”
    I shook my head in warning. The last thing I needed was
his condescending wise ass lecture.
    “Bulk?”
    “Back – the – fuck – off” I cautioned as I downed the
whisky and refilled the glass, “just back off.”
    He held his hands out in front of him as he nodded
simultaneously and retreated a few steps, “Okay.”
    I could feel his eyes on me as I approached the floor to
ceiling window and focused my gaze and attention on the night life below.
People, happy people, people without the pain of loss were strolling and
laughing, their daily lives cheery and carefree and I envied them, envied their
untroubled and easy lives. They didn’t appreciate how damn fucking fortunate
they were. I hated the bloody lot of them as they seemed to look up at me, laughing
and pointing at me as Shona’s voice played on repeat in my head.
    “Chase, make me yours Chase, I need to be yours.
Always yours.”
     
    My god, I missed her. I ached like never before but the
guilt at what I didn’t understand clenched deep in my gut and strangled my
want.
    My want for a little sinner.
    Fuck!
    No, no, no.
    I shook my head rapidly, dismissing the thoughts that
ruled my head and screamed as I launched my glass across the room and relished
in the sound and satisfaction of the shatter. It matched my soul.
    “Whoa, mate, chill out.” Romeo grabbed my arm and before
I realised what I was doing, I had turned on him and smashed my fist into his
jaw.
     
    I stared at him, my eyes as wide as my mouth as he hit
the ground with a heavy thud. “Fuck! Shit, Romeo… I…”
    He clambered off the floor and rubbed his chin as he
glared at me, “I don’t know what the fuck is going on big guy, but get it
together, sort your shit out… now!”
    I squeezed my eyes closed as I desperately fought the
tightness in my chest, “Shit, I…”
    His hands wrapped around the tops of my arms as he stared
straight into me, “Breathe through it Bulk, use it to fight the fucking shit
with.”
    He thumped my chest gently as his eyes fired angrily,
“What the hell has happened?”
    I rubbed my hands over my face and turned back to the
window, desperately trying to calm myself and my burn, “I… fuck…” I blew out a
breath as I rested my forehead on the cool glass, its chill soothing the heat
in my blood and stimulating my brain.
    “She makes me feel… things; want, need, a… a God damn
beat in my chest again” I admitted, finally to myself as well as my friend.
    “Spirit?”
    I tilted my head and turned to him in surprise but he
grinned and scoffed slightly, “Mate, it’s written all over the pair of you. Even
Stevie fuckin’ Wonder would be able to see it.”
    I turned away; I didn’t want to see the acknowledgement
in his face. I wouldn’t acknowledge it; I refused to even accept it. “No… I
can’t.”
    “Why?”
    “You know why, Romeo, because…”
    “Because of Shona?” he asked quietly and her name from
his lips in the same conversation containing Spirit’s name hurt deeply, the guilt
overtook my