are you scared of?â
âI donât know.â
âYouâve been hurt,â he said. âIt shows in the way you move and talk and even in the way you breathe. Men can sense that youâre an easy lay. But I see something else in you. I see a beautiful woman I could love.â
âReally?â She felt stupid. Her voice sounded so unsure. She took another swallow of wine and floated above herself, watching the girl, watching the man who gripped her as he leaned back against the wooden slats of the chair. He stroked her breasts. Aroused, she pressed closer against him, but tears were streaming down her cheeks as a wave of dread swept through her.
âWhatâs the matter?â
âI feel so anxious all the time.â
âAbout what, baby?â
âI donât know.â
He was playing her game. He was drawing her out, and she was revealing too much. But she was tired of struggling to keep her secrets.
âIâm so tired of screwing different men. I want to love one man, and I want to be faithful to him the rest of my life.â
Why was she saying this? The words had come out of her like swallows on wings of their own. She was hungry. Ritz crackers and cheese were all sheâd eaten for dinner. At the Rose Bar sheâd had a rum and coke, and now the wine was giving her a headache. âIs there anything to eat?â she asked.
âNot much. Iâm just about out of food.â He pushed her to her feet, then looked inside the refrigerator and took out a half empty can of beans. Quickly he heated the beans up in a frying pan and put them on a plate with a fork, along with a slice of white bread.
She ate the bread and swallowed a few bites of the beans.
âIs that all you want?â
âIâm sorry. I canât eat any more,â she said, putting down the plate. Her stomach felt queasy, and she was far too excited to eat.
As they stood there in the kitchen, he took her in his arms, pressing his hands against her buttocks so that she could feel his hard cock against her belly. Reaching under her skirt, he ran his fingers along the inside of her thighs and underneath the silken fabric of her panties. He caressed her mound of flesh, stroked the pubic hair, pressed underneath to where she was wet, and slid his fingers inside. Aroused, she pressed even closer against him, contracting involuntarily against his fingers. When he led her by the hand through the narrow hall, she followed him in a daze to his room. He lit another candle. In its flickering light, she saw a mattress with rumpled sheets on the floor, and next to it was a bookcase crammed with books.
He knelt and slipped off her shoes, kissing her bare toes, while she rested her hand on his head for support. Then he unbuttoned her skirt, which fell to the floor. Rising to his feet, he pulled her blouse up over her head and unhooked her bra, holding her full breasts tenderly. She started to take off her panties. âWait, let me,â he said, as he slid them off, and pressed her all naked against him. She could feel how aroused he was. âYouâre so beautiful,â he whispered. âYou have a great body.â
Then he took off his own clothing. He was well-formed and muscular, and his skin glistened with sweat. His cock looked very large. When he pulled her close, she felt herself melting as she never had before with any stranger. âI love you, baby,â he whispered in herear. He pulled her down on top of him on the mattress, rolled her on her back. By now she felt as if she were nothing but a huge wave of desire as he kissed her downwards from her breasts to her belly, then her pubic area and her vulva. He licked and sucked until she moaned with pleasure and gave a little gasp of release. Then he relaxed his hold and pulled himself up so that they were lying full length against each other. âI love you,â he murmured again.
At first she hardly dared to breathe for