Read Dark Parties for Free Online Page A

I try to keep my voice low, but the pressure inside me is building.
    “Not the future I want.” He reaches for my hand and I let him take it. “I want us to get married and start a family.”
    “Don’t be silly,” I say, but I can tell by the look on his face he’s serious. “We just graduated.” I try to withdraw my hand,
     but he pulls it closer to him.
    “Let’s stop wasting time.” He’s kissing the place behind my ear. The place he knows drives me crazy. “Courtney and Kieron.
     Sara and Neil. Jasmine and David. They’re all getting married. Sara’s already pregnant.”
    I try to focus on what he’s saying, not what he’s doing. “What about our vow? We promised. We can’t give in to the government.
     Not now…” I stop talking because he’s not listening. He’s wrapping his arms around me, secretly caressing the side of my breast.
     My body flushes.
    “Ethan, please,” I say, but I’m happy for my body’s response. He kisses a line from my ear to the nape of my neck. I enjoy
     the sensation until I think of Braydon. “Ethan.” I wriggle free.
    He clears his throat. “We’re adults now, Neva. We need to start acting like ones.”
    Where’s all this coming from? “Some arbitrary date on the calendar and some ceremony doesn’t mean—”
    “Neva, I need to tell you something,” he interrupts. But he doesn’t say anything. He removes his watch and places his hand,
     palm-side up, on the table. There’s a thin red line, like a cat scratch, hidden among the blue veins in his wrist, the place
     usually covered by his watch.
    “What’s that?” I ask, and reach out to touch it, but he turns away. “Ethan?”
    “It’s a tracking device. They implanted it after I was arrested.” His back is to me so it feels as if I’m eavesdropping. I
     can’t have heard him right. A tracking device? “They said that they will track my movements. If I go a year without any other
     incidents then they will remove the device.”
    I don’t want him to turn around. I don’t want him to see the shocked look on my face. If I’m with him, the police know exactly
     where to find me. He feels contaminated. I cross my arms tight across my chest. He’s waiting for me to say something, but
     my mouth is dry.
    “I can’t be caught gathering with other people with tracking devices,” he continues. “If they see a cluster of us together
     for too long, they’ll bring us in.”
    I look around. Are they watching us now? I want him to take it back. Tell me it’s a joke. He used to have such a wicked sense
     of humor. He regularly reset the clock in our history class ahead fifteen minutes so we got out of school early. He always
     slipped in later and changed it back so the teacher was none the wiser. He was always doing little pranks like that. But when
     he turns toward me, I can see it’s no joke. His eyes appear darker, haunted, next to his pale skin. “How could you keep this
     from me?”
    “Because of that.” He points to my face. “That look.”
    I try to change my expression, but my face feels set in stone.
    “So much is changing, Neva. I wanted—no,
needed
—us to stay the same.” He moves in for a kiss. I am repelled, but I force myself to give him a quick peck on the lips.
    “I love you,” he says.
    “Why are you telling me this now?” I search his eyes for something familiar.
    “I don’t want this to happen to you,” he says, glancing at the thin red line on his wrist. I don’t know if he means thetracking device or the way that it has drained the life out of him.
    I caress his tiny scar with my finger. I can feel it there, right below the surface of his skin, a thin square. “Does it hurt?”
    He shakes his head.
    “I didn’t know that the government had started—”
    “Me neither.”
    “We’ve got to tell everyone. The government can’t do—”
    “Please, Neva, no. I was forbidden to tell anyone.” He takes my hands in his. “Promise me.”
    I nod. I wish he