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you my life, you knew how dangerous my father was and you went ahead and involved him anyway. Because of you, I’ll never feel love again.”
    “I loved you Jagger, I never wanted bad things to happen, I…”
    “DON’T!” I roar. “Don’t you fuckin’ open your mouth and try to make this better. You had a chance and you picked him. I hope he fucks you until you can’t walk, I hope you rot…”
    “Jagger,” she whispers.
    Fuck, FUCK! I spin around towards her and grip her shoulders. My blood trickles down her top but she doesn’t move.
    “I know ok? I know you fucked up, but while you were fucking up, you fucked me up too. I never asked for that. I gave you everything I had. I loved you.”
    “I loved you too, please believe that.”
    Great now she’s crying. Always my weakness.
    “I can’t believe that, but I didn’t mean what I said. Just let me be, please?”
    She nods and I let her go. I turn and disappear into the darkness, yet again, but in the darkness, I get an idea to keep Willow away from me for good. I’ll do whatever I need to make sure she stays out of this, even if it means breaking her heart.
     

 
     
    CHAPTER 5
    WILLOW
     
    I walk through the door when I arrive home, soaking wet and numb. Jagger’s words play over and over in my head. If you come back, I’ll kill you. I’ll kill you. I’ll kill you. I don’t want you. I don’t love you. The pain in my heart is far beyond anything I’ve ever felt. My heart is clenching and I can’t swallow the lump in my throat. When I step into the living room, everyone gets up quickly and rushes over. I know how I look, I feel just as pitiful.
    “Willow, what happened?” Ace asks, touching my cold, wet cheek.
    I don’t answer. Like a zombie I walk down the hall, forcing each foot to go in front of the other. Forcing my body to move when all I want to do is crumble to the floor and cry until there is nothing left.
    “Willow, honey!”
    Ava’s voice trails down the hall after me, and slowly I turn. My eyes meet a lot of very confused, worried sets. I have to tell them, might as well get it out while it’s playing like a bad song in my head.
    “I saw him. He doesn’t want help. If I go back, he said he’d kill me.”
    The shocked gasps that follow me down the hall and into my room. I shut the door quietly and walk over to the crib where my son is sleeping, thumb in his mouth and looking peaceful. That’s when the wall breaks. My tears begin flowing in a steady stream and before I know it they’re running out and horrible, pained noises are coming from my throat. I feel arms go around me.
    “Oh honey, shhh, ” Jenny whispers.
    I can’t speak, even if I wanted to, I can’t. Jenny rocks me while I continue to bellow like a wounded animal. Cody doesn’t even stir. Soon more arms are around me and Ava has joined the group hug. They both hold me so tightly I can hardly breathe, but that doesn’t stop my breakdown from continuing. It just slowly rips me to pieces inside. Bit by bit, it tears me down.
    “Hey, come on, you know he only said that to scare you off.”
    I stop crying and pull back, staring at them through blurry lashes.
    “No, he meant it.” I whisper, my voice broken.
    “Willow, honey, he didn’t. He doesn’t want you to get involved, if you get involved you’re risking your life. Jagger loves you, he is going to do whatever it takes to make sure you don’t involve yourself and if that means making you think he would hurt you, then he’ll do it. Don’t you see that?”
    I fall silent. I think back to the conversation, and how he paused for a long while. Maybe they’re right, maybe he was trying to scare me off. The pain in my heart is all the same though, and I don’t know if I can continue on and find out if he was protecting me or if he truly meant it.
    “Honey, come on, it’s going to be ok.”
    “I felt him, he was so close.” I whimper.
    The tears start again, and the girls just hold onto me as I breakdown