gulps.
‘I made some new friends,’ Natalia told him with a bright tone that seemed suddenly forced. ‘Jack, meet Tania – I’m sorry, Charlie did tell me your second name but I don’t recall.’
‘Ionescu.’
‘And Orlando … ?
‘Nolan.’
‘You think I give a crap who you are?’ Jack Kane snarled, still drinking as he turned his back.
I gulped and tried to disappear into the Japanese cushions. So either Jack was a serious Method actor so deeply into his role that he chose not to break out of character between takes (I’ve read that some of the biggest stars work this way) or else – and this was a million times more likely – he was a deeply unpleasant, angry alcoholic on a mission to humiliate anyone stupid enough to cross his path. I’m making this call on one swift first impression, I know.
‘We’ll go,’ I said, quickly standing up.
‘No, please!’ Natalia stared at Jack’s back as if she wished she could wave a wand and turn him into somebody who didn’t snarl at strangers and swear and drink. ‘Pay no attention. Jack’s bark is worse than his bite.’
‘“Jack’s bark is worse than his bite!”’ he mimicked in a high-pitched voice. ‘Actually, my bite is much, much worse than my bark and she knows it.’
I was forced to swallow hard and decide which way to go. Should we stick with Natalia’s request for us to stay or follow our natural urge to get the hell out of there? I was shocked, scared, even a little horrified.
I mean, the moment Jack Kane had lurched into the trailer he’d shattered my dreams of how a movie idol should be, which was bad enough. But worse still, how often did those small kids see their dad like this? Plus, how sad Macy would be when I told her. All this ran through my mind in the length of time it took Jack Kane to raise the bottle to his lips again.
‘Ha!’ Jack laughed harshly at the shocked silence then put the bottle back on the shelf. ‘Hang around, you two little lap dogs. Stay with my wife as long as you like. Idolize her like every other poor sap, fall at her feet and give her a fresh topic next time she gets together with her ladies who lunch – you two country hicks look like good comedy value to me. I’m out of here.’ Making as if to leave, he tripped over one of the kids’ toys strewn across the floor then stumbled towards the sofa where Orlando and I sat. Hard-core swearing followed.
Now I was beyond shocked, moving rapidly towards repulsion and wondering how, if this happened on a regular basis, Jack’s minders managed to sober him up enough to deliver his dialogue when necessary and how on earth his PR team kept his serious alcohol intake out of the public eye.
Still swearing, he slumped on to the sofa between me and Orlando. ‘Have you any idea how frickin’ bored I am making this movie?’ he growled. ‘The director’s an asshole. He keeps me hanging around day after day in this crappy sub-zero climate when I could be spending the build-up to Christmas in the Bahamas. You think I’m kidding?’
‘No,’ I assured him. ‘I believe you.’
Jack grunted and squinted at me from under hooded lids. ‘They give me lines a frickin’ parrot could say. All I basically get to do is play with guns, shoot a few guys and screw beautiful girls. Any moron could do it.’
At the far end of the couch, Orlando shrugged.
‘Today I’m thinking, what the hell? Get Charlie to stand in for the action sequences and some of the close-up work too. I mean, who’s going to know the frickin’ difference?’
‘You want to go back to the hotel?’ Natalia asked quietly, picking up her phone to contact the helicopter pilot.
‘No, I don’t want to go back to the hotel.’ Jack mimicked her again, making her sound prim and disapproving. ‘What the hell do I do back there except stare at a TV screen and drink more whisky?’ He sloppily shifted position to turn his back on Orlando and stare directly at me. ‘What was your name