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nip it
in the bud. Even best friends fight, but I didn’t want anything to ruin our
trip.

 
    “I’ll go with you, Leesh. And I’ll do whatever you want to do, too,
Beck,” I said, wanting to be the great compromiser.

 
    “Whatever,” Becky said. “As long as we still go on that hike tomorrow.”

 
    “Um, duh. We have to take some photos
that we can actually show our parents,” Alicia said with a laugh. Even Becky
grinned at that one.

 
    “So…hike. Strip club. Sammy? What’s your new goal?” Alicia looked at me
with genuine curiosity, as well as a twinkle in her eye. I threw her a dirty
look.

 
    “NOT whatever you’re thinking, Alicia. I don’t know. Give me some time to
think,” I said, knowing full well what I really wanted to do. Find Boon. And
see what else he could open me up to…

 
    I must have gone off to la-la land, and had it written all over my face,
because Alicia threw a pillow at me and squealed.

 
    “YOU’RE gonna lose your V-CARD to that BOY!”

 
    She’s small, and she acts ditzy, but you can’t hide a damn thing from
that girl.

~ 8 ~

 
    That
night, despite my still-unbelievable desire to find Boon, I agreed to stay in
and watch movies, so that we could be up bright and early for our hike. I was
still trying to hide my true feelings from my friends, and it was the hardest
thing I’ve ever done in my life. Probably, still, to this day, it’s one of the
hardest things I’ve ever done. Harder than anything that would come next.

 
    It’s
not even like I thought they would judge me: I knew for a fact that Alicia
would encourage me, and that Becky wouldn’t judge me no matter what I did. It
was more like I was worried that by admitting it to them, I would be admitting
it to myself. It was easy to consider it a girlish fantasy, a passing fancy, a
fleeting moment, when I lied to myself. It would be harder if I actually had to
vocalize my feelings to my friends, had to tell them the absolute truth.

 
    Because
I couldn’t lie to them. I could keep silent about something, but I couldn’t
outright lie to them. That’s why, I guess, I didn’t tell them where I really
went when I “went out for air” that night.

 
    But
I know they knew.

~ 9 ~

 
    It
was around ten, and I’d sat patiently through one whole chick flick (Becky’s
choice) and one B-grade horror movie (Alicia’s favorite genre) without picking
up the plot of either. I was a little distracted; I spent half the time
worrying about “sneaking out” for the night and the other half trying to figure
out where I would even start looking for Boon in the wild city.

 
    I
couldn’t, for the life of me, remember the name of the second bar we’d gone to,
but the bar where we met was right next to our hotel. Telling Alicia and Becky
that I was just going to walk around for an hour or so, and trying to avoid
their knowing glances, I put on a pair of shorts and a simple tank top and
slipped out into the hall, a pad of paper and pen in my pocket.

 
    I
figured I’d start at the beginning, and pushed my way through a crowd of
smokers outside the bar where Boon and I had met. Scanning the room, I quickly
confirmed that he wasn’t there. I didn’t bother checking the dance floor;
something told me that Boon wouldn’t be caught dead with a girl twerking
against him.

 
    I
shimmied my way through the crowd to the bar, looking for a familiar face
amongst the bartenders. Finally, I noticed that one of the bartenders was the
same one from the night before, the one who had made me Boon’s “awful” Seven
and Seven. I waited for about two minutes before the bartender approached me.

 
    “What’ll
it be, princess?”

 
    “I’m
actually not drinking tonight, I’m looking for someone,” I said, noting the way
the bartender rolled his eyes.

 
    “Everyone’s
looking for someone, sweetheart,” he said, turning away. I reached over the bar
and grabbed his sleeve. He was my first and,