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questioned my mother when she would tell me what would be expected of me, or when she would teach me things “I would need to know.” I think she always knew I wouldn’t be a good fit in the community, maybe that’s why it was decided I would marry Uncle Simon. Out of all the men in the community, he was by far the hardest on his wives, everyone knew it. While they claim that God tells the prophet whom the girls should marry, I always thought that was a lie.
    The door opens again making me jump. Jordan walks back in and comes over to me. He sits down and pulls me so that my head is resting on his lap. He doesn’t say a word; we both just sit there as he runs his hand through my hair.
    “Do I have to leave?” I finally break the silence. I need to know my fate.
    His hand stops moving in my hair. He lifts me so I’m sitting in front of him. “Is everyone happy that those assholes showed up? Fuck no. That doesn’t mean we will turn our backs on you. We gave our word to help and protect you and we damn sure meant it. Pres is actually tearing Twisted a new asshole because the cops snuck in behind him.”
    “I just hate feeling like I am a burden to everyone.” I look down as I fidget with my hands.
    “You aren’t. From what you’ve said and the way your body reacted to hearing his voice, I’m glad you got out of there. Don’t doubt your place here.” I look into his eyes and I believe every word. Within my family everything was held over your head. You were taught that you should be thankful that you were even being fed.
    “What is my place here?” I am so unsure of myself, so insecure. That’s how my family liked you. They didn’t want women to be confident in themselves or feel good. If you were then you might start to think for yourself and the whole system would fall apart.
    “Your place here is that you are a part of this family. You are one of us. You are home.” His eyes stare into mine.
    Home. It was a word that to most people, was something that was taken for granted. My home for most of my life was hell. Adjusting to that word meaning something good would take some getting used to. It is definitely going to be an adjustment being here, and realizing that everything I knew before was wrong.
    “I need to go talk to the guys. You okay?” I nod. He pauses before standing up, the two of us just looking at each other. I remember the way it felt when he kissed me. His lips were soft, his touch gentle. I want to feel it again.
    He stands quickly and exits my room.
    Wishful thinking.
     
     
     

It’s Thanksgiving and I’ve been at the club for a little over six months. Everything still seems so foreign to me. The guys have been welcoming for the most part and are constantly telling me that I’m family. I guess in a way I just don’t feel it.
    I feel like I’m just passing through, without any real purpose here. My days and nights are spent cooking and cleaning. I’m so scared that I won’t live up to what they want from me and I’ll be out on the street.
    There isn’t much for me to do here. I can’t leave the clubhouse. My family is looking for me and since I’m a minor and I’ve been reported missing, the MC could get in a lot of trouble for having me here. The guys have seen my uncle around town and the missing posters are still circulating. This means I can’t go to school either. Tracie has been bringing me books and stuff to read from the library and I’ve talked to her about taking a GED when I turn eighteen so I can at least have a diploma.
    I make three meals a day even though Shooter only told me I need to make dinner. It helps to pass the time and I know the boys appreciate it. I usually give one of the guys my grocery list and they go out and get all the supplies. Usually the day after one of their parties is my busiest mainly because the place is a mess. You might think I would get resentful but I don’t. If I wasn’t cleaning or cooking, I’d just be sitting in my room.