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this in the best way friends can.” How was this guy straight and not taken? I briefly wondered if I could get over the whole mixed-signal-sexuality thing and go after Anders? Nope. Wasn’t going to happen. “We will listen, we will tell her she’s wise and wonderful, and we’re going to help her find a fling that will allow her to forget Erik.”
    I groaned. “I’m not exactly ready to date. It’s been three days. I think I’ll take a little time for myself, no guys. Except you, of course,” I said to Anders with a smile.
    “Girls?” Lily offered helpfully.
    “Neither sex,” I said. “No sex, that is. I don’t need sex.”
    Lily wiggled a finger at me. “Oh, but you do. You need sex. Sex will make you forget.”
    “When is the last time you slept with Erik?” Anders asked abruptly. “I don’t mean to push, since it’s really not appropriate, but it’s an important question. Answer honestly.”
    I glanced around the table and saw that all three sets of eyes were fixed on me. “A few weeks ago. Maybe more.”
    Both Lily and Anders squealed. “No!”
    Lily poured me more wine, while Anders slapped at the table. “It’s like you’re a virgin again.”
    “Oh, come on, don’t be so freaking dramatic,” I said. “A few weeks is not that weird.” Under my breath, I muttered, “Or a month or whatever.”
    “You lived with your boyfriend. Was he doing self-service in the bathroom at night?” Lily snorted. “A little jerky-jerk in the intern room at lunch?”
    Cat knocked her on the shoulder. “Hello? You’re talking about my brother, pervert.”
    “First and foremost, he is Stella’s ex-boyfriend,” Lily argued. “He’s fair game. I don’t care if he’s the Pope’s brother, he’s getting picked on tonight.” Cat nodded, then topped off her wine glass and waved the empty bottle in the air to request another.
    I couldn’t help but laugh. “I threw my back out, got fat. I don’t know, I haven’t exactly been feeling romantic.”
    Lily reached across the table and held my hands in hers. “I will share a little secret with you: sex is not always about romance, sweetheart. Maybe that’s what you learned reading Judy Blume, but things change when you grow up. Sometimes, it’s nice to fuck someone for the fun of it. To sex!” Lily cried out a little too loudly, holding her drink up, and I knew she’d crossed the line between buzzed and drunk.
    Anders cringed.
    “I’m going on nine weeks,” Cat said suddenly, a little too quietly to really hear over Lily’s whooping and laughing. “Maybe ten. Also, Travis and I sleep in separate bedrooms.”
    The wine arrived then, and we all quieted down. I was the first one to speak after our glasses were all refilled. “Are you pregnant again?”
    Lily and Anders both “ oh -ed,” and we all looked to Cat for confirmation. “Nope, not pregnant. Just frigid, I guess.” She grinned. “I get it,” she told me. “You just get distracted, and other stuff takes over. I thought it was just couples with kids who had this issue, but it makes me feel a little less bad that you and Erik are—were?—in the celibacy club, too. You learn to forget there was once a sex life to be had, right?”
    I nodded. That’s exactly what had happened. We just started to take each other for granted. Good sex was the first thing to go, foreplay was second, and eventually sex of all variety went away altogether. We’d never been super into exciting and spontaneous sex, but anything that might have been considered hot had cooled down years ago. Bummer, sure, but other stuff took over and mattered more. “I miss that early relationship sex,” I said, suddenly realizing I did. I thought back to the night at Molto , and to the tingling in my fingers as he’d stroked my hands. I thought about how alive that sensation could make me feel.
    “It’s not ‘early relationship’ sex you need—you don’t need anything with the word relationship tied to it. You’re