chair, leaning over his desk and giving him a sincerely concerned look.
'' I said quit, Kathleen. There's a difference. I know what you saw when you walked in here. This isn't the poshest address I've ever had. Times changed. Fashions changed. It wasn't that I lacked the skill, Kathleen; I lacked the style people want in their lawyers today. I would never deal from the bottom of any deck. I won cases based on the law of the land and my wits, not the entertainment value of a defense. When people stopped wanting that, I couldn't change. But now I see the pendulum swinging again. I've watched. I've listened. It's time for me to move again. I'm just not as spry as I used to be. I simply can't do it on my own. Who else could I trust to see the vision but you, Kathleen? Even as a child you recognized that one must never give up on a dream.''
Kathleen half started out of her chair, frustrated and set in motion by her own guilt. She didn't want Gerry O'Doul to need her. She'd fulfilled her familial obligations long ago. She had been nurse to her mother and a scapegoat for her father. She had done everything that was expected of her. Half her life was given to the discharge of those responsibilities, and she wouldn't take them up again.
'' You don't even know me, Uncle Gerry. I was a girl in high school when you last saw me. A lot has happened since then and some of it I'm not too happy about.''
'' You're right. High school was a long while ago. But now I see the woman who sits here, and I can see your life behind your eyes. I know that you sacrificed a career to care for your mother. I know your father was difficult to live with.''
'' No, that's not how it was. I just didn't do anything to change my life or my job,'' she insisted, uncomfortable with the heroic role in which he tried to cast her. He was supposed to be the hero.
'' And you lived in a small town where opportunities were limited.'' Another excuse became forgiving fact.
'' I didn't have the ambition, Gerry, that's why I haven't done more and gone further. . .'' She scooted further up in her chair and laid her arms across his desk. Her hands folded as if pleading with him to stop recasting her so she could stop putting herself down. He was giving her credit for high minded decisions when, in reality, her life had been comfortable and slipped away from her and part of it was his fault. He'd left just when she dared to dream.
Unaware of her pain, Gerry twisted the knife with a loving flourish. ''And you took the opportunity when it came along. Smart girl! Beautiful girl. My niece, for sure.''
Kathleen looked away. One thing was true. She did take the opportunity he held out to her. This time she couldn't blame him when she was the one who did the taking.
'' Uncle Gerry. . .''
'' Gerry. . .''
'' I appreciate all this, but I can't stay. I can't work with you.''
Her hands slid off the desk and into her lap. The blue dress, the white piping, the red nails. She should be waving the flag instead of burning her bridges. The thought of going back to Banning, a hot and barren place with small town problems, was so hard to imagine. But she wouldn't be an old maid holding the arm of a legal legend as he limped toward one last hurrah. Better a small fish in a small pond, than a bit of muck in the Koi pool.
'' Kathleen.''
Gerry O'Doul's voice lost its vitality and Kathleen couldn't look at him. She could be mediocre without his help, but she couldn't face being a shadow on the wrong side of the bright streets of Beverly Hills.
'' Uncle Gerry, I just didn't think it would be so overwhelming. . .'' She offered a small and useless shrug, knowing now she would never tell him the whole truth, but this miserable reunion had to come to an end.
'' So it's not disappointment. Well, 'tisn't that nice to know. You had me worried.'' Gerry nodded sagely. ''Beverly Hills is a world away from Banning isn't it, Kathleen? My goodness, of course you didn't think it would be so
Kit Tunstall, R.E. Saxton