Calling All Birdbrains

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Book: Read Calling All Birdbrains for Free Online
Authors: R.L. Stine
big victory for Bernie and The Ecch.
    VOLLEYBALL: Sherman got his head stuck in the net. Yes, the bad-luck parrot struck again. It took Nurse Hanley an hour to untangle it. Sherman had net marks all over his face! Bernie and Jen won again, just to make it a perfect day.
    â€œYAAAAAAY!” Jennifer went totally nuts.She lifted me off the ground and ran around the lake, holding me over her head like a prize fish and cheering her head off. “We won! We won the trophy!”

    The Ecch really loves trophies.
    She made three laps around the lake, tossing me into the air and catching me as she ran. Then everyone gathered in a circle around Coach Bunz. It was time for Coach to award the trophy.
    Snarling like a dog, Sherman stormed up to me. He shoved Lippy into my face. “Take this squawker back!” Sherman shouted. “He’s yours. He’s totally bad luck. He even broke my new phone!”
    â€œYessss!” I cried. I pumped my fists into the air. Then I gently placed Lippy on my shoulder.
    I had my beautiful pet back. And I helped Jennifer win her precious trophy.
    Could life be any sweeter?
    How long would the good times last?
    About thirty seconds.

Chapter 22
F LAT B ERNIE
    â€œThe Rotten Trophy is not about winning, ” Coach Bunz boomed. “And it’s not about losing . It’s all about tradition . The tradition of…of winning and losing.”
    He took a deep breath. His stomach inflated like a blimp. He continued his speech. “On this beautiful morning—or is it afternoon? Let me check my watch. It’s…”
    â€œJust hand over the trophy!” Jennifer snapped.
    â€œOh. Okay,” Coach Bunz said. He picked up the gleaming silver cup and handed it to me.
    I turned and started to carry it over to Jennifer.
    That’s when Lippy climbed onto my head. I felt something warm and gloppy plop onto my forehead. It oozed down over my eyes and…
    â€¦I tripped !
    I stumbled and fell.
    And guess where I landed. You got it. On the trophy .
    I heard a loud

    At first, I thought it was my bones !
    But no. Wiping bird glop off my face, I pulled myself up. And squinted down at the trophy beneath me.
    Flat. I’d crushed it flat.
    I turned and saw The Ecch shaking her big fist at me. “You RUINED it! You RUINED my trophy!”
    I took off running. Running for my life.
    â€œStop! STOP, you trophy wrecker!” Jennifer screamed. She thundered after me, shaking her big fist like a club. “How does the name Flat Bernie sound to you?”
    Not good.
    I ran as hard as I could. And as I ran, the bad-news parrot squawked all the way:

About the Author
    R.L. Stine graduated from Rotten School with a solid D+ average, which put him at the top of his class. He says that his favorite activities at school were Scratching Body Parts and Making Armpit Noises.
    In sixth grade, R.L. won the school Athletic Award for his performance in the Wedgie Championships. Unfortunately, after the tournament, his underpants had to be surgically removed.
    R.L. was very popular in school. He could tell this because kids always clapped and cheered wheneverhe left the room. One of his teachers remembers him fondly: “R.L. was a hard worker. He was so proud of himself when he learned to wave bye-bye with both hands.”
    After graduation, R.L. became well known for writing scary book series such as The Nightmare Room, Fear Street, Goosebumps, and Mostly Ghostly, and a short story collection called Beware!
    Today, R.L. lives in a cage in New York City, where he is busy writing stories about his school days. Says he: “I wish everyone could be a Rotten Student.”
    For more information about R.L. Stine, go to www.rottenschool.com and www.rlstine.com
    Visit www.AuthorTracker.com for exclusive information on your favorite HarperCollins author.

ROTTEN SCHOOL
Series:
    #1. The Big Blueberry Barf-Off!
    #2. The Great Smelling Bee
    #3. The Good, the Bad and the Very Slimy
    #4.

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