Give me something .”
He clenched his jaw. Stay the night —
Give her something . That was the scariest part of all. Because she wasn’t talking about gifts.
“Ali.” A vise closed around his throat as he stared at her.
She jerked her chin up and he knew, then and there, if he couldn’t give in, if he couldn’t find a way to do this, he might as well turn away and walk now. “The whole town will talk if I stay the night, Ali-girl.” He floundered for a logical reason to explain why he shouldn’t. An excuse. It was just an excuse and he knew it as he reached up to cup her cheek, stroke his thumb across her full lower lip.
“They’ve been talking about me off and on ever since I got knocked up in high school.” She shrugged and reached up, curling her hand around his wrist. “I’m not worried about it. But it’s not just that. Are you going to stop acting like we’re buddies ? I want…”
Her voice skipped and then steadied as she met his eyes. She guided his hand down and he curled it into a fist, impotent and useless.
“I need more,” she said, her voice soft, her gaze steely. “I deserve more. I want a man in my life who doesn’t mind showing up at my door on a Friday night and taking me out to dinner. Somebody who might think about being more in my life, later on down the road.”
“I have no problem taking you out to dinner.” It made him nervous as hell, if he was honest, but he’d rather do that than lose her. He’d been so careful, all his life, never to let anybody in, but he’d messed up with her. She’d gotten in past his walls and now he couldn’t change that.
He had to change something, though, and fast. Or he’d lose her.
He’d lost too much and there was so little left already.
She continued to watch him, her gaze somber. “What about when it’s time for the next step?” she asked softly.
Wary, he watched her.
“What next step?”
“Yeah.” She nudged him back and eased off the counter. She took her wineglass and tossed it back like it was whiskey. Over her shoulder, she looked at him, her eyes glinting in the dim light, dark brown hair framing her pretty face, her mouth unsmiling. “The next step, Tate.”
Then she turned to face him and he never had a chance to brace himself as she gave him a sucker punch that sent him reeling.
“You think I care about you? Screw that. I’m in love with you.” Her eyes flashed as she glared at him. “I have been for a long time. But … that’s not enough. Sooner or later, I want a man in my life who is going to want to be a part of my life. A part of my kids’ lives. Forever. I want somebody who might want to think about marrying me. Being a father to my kids. I want more than … this.”
I’m in love with you. The words left him reeling. His heart slammed against his ribs. In the back of his mind, voices screamed. Terror tried to choke him.
“I loved your mother.”
“Trailer trash.”
“We can’t do this here—”
No. Not love. She couldn’t …
But even under the terror, something sweet, something powerful shifted, tried to grow. He refused to look at it. He couldn’t.
Pushing it back down, he buried it. “Ali,” he said, his voice raw. “You … look. That’s … it’s too much. I’m a bad bet for that sort of thing, and you know it.”
“Oh, Tate.”
She sighed and put her wineglass down and then came up to him, cupping his face in her hands. “No. You’re not. You’re the absolute best bet. I adore you. My kids adore you. You can’t tell me that you don’t adore them. I see you with them. I know you care. But I can’t make you want us.” She pressed her lips to his.
It was a soft, sweet kiss.
Gentle.
A good-bye.
He felt like his heart was going to shatter.
Right there. Shatter into pieces and fall to the floor. Something awful and hollow settled in the spot where his heart had been.
“You think it’s because I don’t want you?” He fisted his hands in her hair and